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hi all, im just looking for advice, i split form my partner a year ago and have a 2 year old with her. al was fine with contact until her new partner came alone. first she started demanding i pay her more money, i pay directly through CSA, then she said i could have my child if my partner wasn't around(shes met my partner numerous times). Now ive just found out that she applied for a passport for my child and taken her to Spain with her new partner, all i know of this person is hes 40 odd years of age. she refuses to tell me his name or anything. I had a photo sent to me of my child saying "look daddy im so happy im going to Spain" as you can imagine that was very distressing. every time i have tried to contact my ex now i get her partner threatening me telling me how much of a rubbish father am i and i should forget about my child. It has now been brought to my attention by a family member who cuts my ex hair that her partner speaks to my ex like [censored], in front of my child, controls her and has soul control of my ex phone. this has made me very concerned for my child's well being and safety. i have previously sent a letter from my solicitor to my ex regarding contact which was ignored. where do i stand, the next time i have my child do i have the right not to take her home because im concerned for her safety? ring the police while i have her and tell them my concerns? any help would be grateful.
Hi there
If your ex's partner is threatening you with physical violence then you should report it to the police. He has no rights to dictate to you about your child, but if as you've been told, she is under his control, he would want to remove you from their lives.
Unless your ex speaks out about his behaviour, you would find it difficult to prove.
Your best option is to start the ball rolling with mediation, this is the first step and compulsory before court action can be taken. You will need to make an appointment and go and discuss your situation with the mediator who will then contact your ex and ask her to attend. If she ignores the request, refuses to attend, or mediation fail, the mediator will sign the form which will enable you to apply to the court for a Child Arrangements Order for contact.
I don't think it would be wise to keep your child the next time you have her, although I understand your concerns I don't think it would be enough if she applied to the court to have her returned.
Try mediation, if she ignored a solicitors letter, she is likely to do the same with the mediator, after a couple of weeks the mediator will sign the form for you.
If he is threatening you and you get the police involved it will be on file, you could then alsoapply for a Prohibited Steps Order and ask the court to stop him being around your child.
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