[Solved] change of contact, no order

Hi Dale

Although your agreement is informal, if your child has had a fixed routine and a schedule of contact that has been in place for the last year, the court are likely to support a return to that.

The sooner you get the ball rolling the better, get to mediation and then if that fails, apply for a Child Arrangements Order tomhave the original schedule defined legally. If you leave it and her amended schedule settles in there will be a new precedent set.

What is your current schedule?

Hi Mojo,

Thanks for the reply, our arrangement is i have every weekend one slightly longer than the other. Although our child is approx 2 and a half, this has been in place a year. The ex would like to change it to every other weekend with a small consesion to make up for it, where as I wanted to up the contact. The closer to 50 50 the better.

We obviously disagree and at the moment look to be going down the wrong path. With various accusations of being possessive and wanting to take control being leveled at me.

Before going legal, I'd love some advice

It really does depend on the judge on the day unfortunately, alternate weekends and a weekly midweek is the generally accepted norm, but that's not to say you wouldn't be successful.

It's a tough one, with the age of your child, they are unable to express themselves and if you have been having your child every weekend give or take, if she works, she could argue that she wants more quality time with your child and that usually means shared weekends.

Think about some different schedules and perhaps propose them at mediation.

Cheers again,

I've had every weekend, never missed a beat, and made every effort to have any extra time I can get within the week too. She doesn't work, and has several other kids. I believe it's mostly down to jealousy regarding how much our kid enjoys the 1 on 1 that I can offer.

I agreed to every other weekend making sure it was all of the weekend and suggested Tues and Thurs nights every week to fill the gap of the missing weekend, presuming they're overnights too. That has been denied and she's offered extended time on the Sunday and a couple of hours every Wednesday to make up for losing a weekend.

My concern is our kid obviously loves the 1 on 1 she gets and the amount of learning/art craft/play etc she gets, and has formed meaningful relationships with people in my life, and really looks forward to seeing them. I don't want her to miss out on this opportunities .

Albeit she is quite young she is fully aware of what's going on

Hi.

You don't mention what financial arrangement you have for supporting your child whilst with her but something to bare in mind because if your ex claims maintenance via The CMS, the amount of times you have your child overnight can change the amount you have to pay her. She may be trying to reduce the number of overnights you get so she gets more money. As you don't mention she is offering you additional overnights for what you lose. Just a thought 🙂

Thank you Stacey,

I'm sure it's nothing to do with that, we've had the same arrangement regarding that since we split, and it's never been mentioned since. Bearing in mind it was the first thing she said when we split I'm pretty sure it's not that. It's worth considering though thanks