[Solved] CAFCASS

My son has tons of evidence, showing that he has had contact, text messages and vile abusive texts from his EX. But the courts and CAFCASS were not interested. They really do believe everything his EX has stated, without any proof, only the witness statement of her best friend. The Judge believes that he his son is at risk if he is in contact with my son... !! which is so heart breaking, as just not true.

I wish we could have had legal support (but could not afford it), however in hind sight, my son is just not forthcoming or experienced enough to fight his case, he just crumbled when all the allegations came back as found true by the judge.

CAFCASS have also said that his son would be at risk if contact is resumed. so have ordered indirect only.

Dont know what to do next, wish I could have my day in court and tell them a few home truths, but it's not going to happen.

When the CAFCASS lady came round, I had to leave the room and didnt have the chance to speak, which was so dissappointing. She was not interested in the all the text messages and picutres i had printed out. She just kept repeating to my son... that the judge has found the facts to be true. I think my son needs to just accept that it will be indirect contact and move on, as this has completely broken him. You can't fight something you can't prove, when the courts and CAFCASS dont want to look at the evidence you have.

In the report CAFCASS have said:

Regarding contact centre is says:

This would certainly ensure that the child was physically safe, but it is not viable long term solution and unless there is a clear exit plan it would not be in the the childs best interests to start contact that would then potentially have to stop.

I really don't understand this statement. What are your thoughts?

TBH the Judge really was not on my son's side at court last time, and i believe he will go with the CAFCASS recommendations. Which is "Indirect Contract" with the chance to apply to court again after 1 year. WE have sent cards, gifts etc, and have never had any reply or thank you. I know my grandchild is being told the gifts are from his mum (not us).

Also CAFCASS visited my grandson at his home with his mother present. This is part of the report:

Grandson ** completed the three houses worksheet on my computer. Grandson * was able to move figures and place who he wanted to have in certain houses. Grandson* placed himself, his baby sister, Mummy and (step-father) and a friend in the ‘happy house’. In the ‘safe house’ he placed his maternal grandparents and added some figures to keep them company. Grandson ** placed figures in the ‘sad house’ but they were not named, and he only did that so that the house would not be empty. Grandson** did not mention his father or paternal grandparents and given the uncertainty of these proceedings I did not ask him a direct question.

I found this really hard to understand, CAFCASS state "grandson did not mention us, so she did not ask him a direct question". He is only 5 years old and have had no contact with his dad or us for over a year... so he would not mention us unless you asked him about us... Why would he, he doesn't know it's a test.. I am completely flabbergasted by this..... is this RIGHT, it sounds so wrong.

It seems crazy and I totally agree with you as if they don't directly ask a child about daddy they won't speak of them especially if contact been a year and child is so young.
This is our worry now with pending report.

Did they comment on how mum has not encouraged a relationship with father?
Children adapt so quickly which is a good and bad thing. But for your son it is bad as the child now has adapted to life without him and they just get on with it because they have no choice.

I have read your son not coped too well in court and finds it harrowing so not able to get his point across.
But maybe an idea if you do not agree with CAFCASS report I know you can't complain to them but it does state you can bring up all points you disagree with in court.
Can you both go through CAFCASS report and cross reference why you disagree and bring up and even reference in the evidence they've refused to take notice of.

He must have a strong case if he has this evidence.
It just mean with the one chance he gets on 2nd October he really has to hold his head up high and put up a fight. Without coming across bolshy and aragant but using the facts and evidence and not being worried to speak up for himself.

My partner felt he was in the best position being able to speak up in court for every situation brought up. Where his ex could not talk as she has a solicitor.

I suggest build him up get him prepared and get something written up to argue his points and disagreements with the report.

Good luck!! Seems so cruel!
Sorry I can't help more with experience. Hopefully someone who has had similar situation may comment and give more info.

Hi,

It must be really difficult what you and your son are going through.

My interpretation would be that a contact centre could work but because it is not a long term solution it is not worth putting the child to reinstate contact and then lose contact and 'play' with the childs emotions (after all they look at the childs best interests first and they would not recommend an on-off non-routine contact as the child will need stability, routined continuous contact)

With the indirect contact i would maybe try and get it across to the judge that it can only work if both parents work together, i.e your son will be happy to have indirect contact, to have letters/gifts sent maybe even ask to have a video call every week etc but the mother needs to spend the time with the child to make it clear that daddy sent a letter and read it out to the child, and without the mothers cooperation it will not work and obviously you want it to work to build a relationship again with the child and get to a stage beyond contact centres.

The test they did, well they attempted that test with my partners child at their mothers home, but she did not really follow what the cafcass worker was trying to do and just started playing instead. If the gson hasnt had contact i agree he wouldnt just mention his dad but maybe this is something that could be brought up in court.

With the recommendations of indirect contact, maybe a video call more so and contact centre for x amount of months with your son on DV course, and fully cooperating for what they think will be best for the child maybe they can look to change it when hes proven to have stable safe contact? Maybe your son can also ask for a review 6 months down the line?

I think at this stage he needs to cooperate and look at the bigger picture, start with the smallest amount of indirect contact, use it as a foundation to build on.

Theres not much else or anything different i would suggest to my partner if he were in your sons position. Just wish you luck and make sure your son looks at the bigger picture, years down the line and not to focus on having it all right now.
Good Luck

I'm so sorry to hear about this latest setback Nannykit. The judge is likely to go with cafcass recommendations,

I think it might be helpful to prepare a written response to the points raised in the report and ask for permission to file it. There should be a final hearing and an opportunity for your son to question the author of the report.

I have known long term contact taking place at a contact centre, I would argue that several sessions of supervised contact with a written report for the court would be in the child's best interests, particularly as it was felt that the child couldn't be asked about his relationship with his father and paternal grandparents. Push for it and a hearing to review the contact centre report, before the court make a final decision.

Best of luck

I have been looking into programmes/courses offered by CAFCASS, as in the Section 7 the officer says "I would suggest the (my son) identify courses that he considers suitable, and if after a year he feels he has made sufficient progress he could make a further application for direct contact"

I have seen CCI Course - but have read these are hardly ever offered? My questions are:
Which courses should my son be looking into?
Would these need to be CAFCASS recommended?

I need to contest that 1 year before any direct contact is too long for a 4 year old not to see his dad (this will make it 2 years).

Thanks

Hi NannyKit,
My Son had similar but after no help from cafcass in finding a course (they ignored him),he did one that when cafcass wrote their add-on s7 refused to acknowledge as acceptable, even though its a course that is used to train heath visitors in our LA. Don't know if that was because his cafcass woman was such a bit*h or if you do have to do one they tell you too. Its frustrating as they don't get back to you (or my sons didn't) but don't waste time doing anything until they've approved it imho.

I wish you all the luck in the world. I know what you're going through. My Son and many many other Sons are falsely accused daily and find themselves in the biased sexist situation. Sadly if affected my Son so badly both mentally and physically he had to withdraw his application (after once more being denied all contact) and we are all trying to move on with our lives.

I need to campaign against the injustice of family court but don't know where to begin. Any ideas anyone?

Granny (on hold, maybe again one day)

Hi Granny

It's really hard when it's your son going thru this, as you want to be there for them and stand up for them in court, especially when the WHOLE system seems to be against them.

The whole process has really knocked my son and his belief that he will ever see his son again, so much so that when he goes back to court on the 2nd, he is going to accept what ever they offer and just not fight anymore to prove that the allegations are false. I believe the Judge will go with the CAFCASS S7 report and he will be given "Indirect Contact" only, which we have been doing anyway for the past year with cards, presents, xmas, birthday, easter etc.

The Family Court system, in my opinion & our experience, will always choose the mother and believe the lies of DV without proof or evidence. We have evidence from the police disclosure that their was NO DV and his EX said in the statement that she called them "Out of Spite" - this was brushed aside. However the Witness (her best friend) spouted lie after lie and this was found to be true... even though family members who lived in the same street NEVER witnessed any abuse. The judge in his summing up said "you have fooled the police and family memebers, but you do not fool me"...

So moving on, We are also going to now move on with our lives and keep up the indirect contact, but my son has said that he will not apply for a contact order again, as it is a completely waste of time, as he has to wait 1 year before doing so and by that time he would not have any contact with his 5 year old son for 2 years and will be a complete stranger to him.