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Hi all, I welcome all advice thank you!
I have a CAO which is 50/50. I managed to gain this after paying an absolute extortionate amount also whilst combatting a falsely imposed NMO so the mother could gain legal aid. Within the last 12 months I have been subject to abuse out in the street, name slandered all online with every horrifying possible thing she could put, false arrests on apparent breaches of the NMO and constant barraging off how she is going to do what she wants with our daughter because men don't have rights. All the allegations were proven false and NMO dismissed after 5 months and 3 weeks. coincidently consolidated with CAO. Long story short I got the 50/50 I was trying to achieve and disproved her lies and stop to her reign of terror in regards to believing she could get live in order and me 1 day a month.
Obviously legally I can not discuss all aspects of the CAO because in bold letters it states I will be punished for such.
However there were 2 specifics. She had to provide her residential address for me to drop my daughter off to on handovers, 2nd was to give me details of holidays. after 3 weeks of the CAO she still hadn't provided (sealed orders received only 1 week ago). So upon the handover time I refused to hand back because I don't have an address to take her back to. I am now breaking the CAO I fought for but under duress. Same with holiday details. Only after me putting in a C79 enforcement order on Saturday morning, she then provides the details of both address, though not on ID so I can't take them as proof and the holiday booking reference. Now I only received those after firstly, refusal to take my daughter back to her which was impossible anyway and then 2 strangers approaching my front door telling me to hand them my daughter if they release the infomation though the mother is also attempted suicide!
My question is now. I obviously refused to hand my daughter over to the strangers and I am not going to hand her to the mother either. Though it will damage I'm sure the CAO that took me so long to gain but it is a safety concern for my daughter. Child services don't want to know until something actually happens. So emergency order is out the question. Do I Just wait for this C79 to come through to take us back to court for me to say my piece or do I have another leg to stand on? I appreciate mental health effects all at some point but an 'attempt' at killing herself seems imminient danger to me as my daughter is only 2 years of age. Also if the mother is this far down the mental health spiral I don't want it projected onto my daughter.
Very messy situation but I am prepared for the consequences if it means keeping my daughter safe and well.
thanks all!
hi,
if mother attempted suicide then I think that is a serious concern regarding child. many kept children away from fathers for months during the lockdowns, citing covid as a risk. would suggest you inform social/children services and could ask police to do welfare check on mother. then you could use these logs/records when you go back to court. in the order, do these issues about home address and holidays fall under the recitals section?
If child is in imminent danger then you should speak to child protection or social service. Any CAO breaches will have to be heard before a judge which could be months after application.
Hi, Thanks for the replies. I have contacted Children services and until something 'actually' happens they are not interested. Same with the police through 101 service in reporting for welfare of the mother. I am honestly very much appalled by this response from those authorities. However I have continued to file the C79 and awaiting further information regarding that. Also I am now aware that the mothers solicitors has now filed for an urgent case hearing due to my withholding. This is a benefit to me due to then being able to share with the courts my concerns on safety, the upside in this is that I originally applied for the CAO so why would I want to Jeopardise it and that safety for such a young child generally trumps the CAO in regards to failed contact. But I am not going to count all my chickens yet and if there is a consequence to my withholding then so be it. The safety of my daughter of course is the absolute goal here.
I was just hoping there was a specific issue order or and emergency order in which could of been attained before the real trouble starts of having to potential deflect people approaching my front door and causing a more physical situation.
If any further information is available dads it would be highly appreciated!
If social services believe that a child is imminent danger of harm then they would support an application for child protection. This is usually in place for 7 days while a multi-agency investigation takes place in order to determine the allegations.
You might receive a notice for the urgent hearing very soon. I would start preparing a short statement with exhibits. This will allow you time to review it before the hearing.
What a sad situation to be in. Make sure you keep a diary of all the incidents that occur as you may well need the evidence in the future. Keep a record of absolutely everything
@mrstrange I too had that same information given to me on my local council website however upon contacting the duty that called me back told me that until something happens they can’t give such orders. I too questioned at great length that why on earth is the information on the website not in line with what you are telling me. I simply got ‘until imminent danger which translates to my daughter with the suicidal mother and then I find out for me to be able to retrieve my daughter’.
no preventative measure is possible. Well as you can probably tell I ignored that and kept hold of my daughter awaiting for the courts. I am not going to knowingly send my daughter into a potentially life threatening situation. I have since paid for the C79 and awaiting my time and date now for said potential hearing.
@champagne I have kept everything! From messages to pictures to cctv to medical reports. The absolute lot. Thank you 😊
@mrstrange I too had that same information given to me on my local council website however upon contacting the duty that called me back told me that until something happens they can’t give such orders. I too questioned at great length that why on earth is the information on the website not in line with what you are telling me. I simply got ‘until imminent danger which translates to my daughter with the suicidal mother and then I find out for me to be able to retrieve my daughter’.
no preventative measure is possible. Well as you can probably tell I ignored that and kept hold of my daughter awaiting for the courts. I am not going to knowingly send my daughter into a potentially life threatening situation. I have since paid for the C79 and awaiting my time and date now for said potential hearing.
@champagne I have kept everything! From messages to pictures to cctv to medical reports. The absolute lot. Thank you 😊
@mrstrange Hi, Also I am not ignoring your message good sir, it just says I can't reply yet?
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