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Arggghhhh! House an...
 
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[Solved] Arggghhhh! House and separation...


Posts: 1
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(@southwesterner)
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Joined: 12 years ago

Hi guys

i need a little bit of advice...

My wife and I separated last year we own a house together. At the moment we live in our respective parents homes and rent out our joint property to cover the bills and mortgage.
I have paid the loan and credit card we have for the past five months. And I gave her £500 when we first split as she is taking care of our daughter. Apart from this I have bought her groceries for the past five months and my parents have paid for most of my daughters new clothes etc.

Suddenly this week my wife has decided she doesn't want my parents to look after our daughter after nursery and on weekends and instead she wants to pay a nanny to do all these hours instead (which would cost around £250 pw) as I didn't agree she has now handed in her resignation at work and has said she wants to move back in to our house and she will not pay anything to the mortgage or loans or credit card and default on them all so I am forced into bankruptcy or at very least not able to get another mortgage/loan etc - she says she will be ok as the council will have to house her as she has a baby.

She says the courts will be on her side if I try to stop her as they will want my daughter to have a roof over her head.
Surely as she is planning to ruin me I have the right to say that we will sell the house instead, pay off the loans and mortgage and have around £12k each at the end of it?

Please help, I don't know what to do!

5 Replies
5 Replies
 actd
Registered
(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11890

I'd have a word with the Citizens Advice Bureau, or go and see a divorce solicitor for an initial consultation (which you should be able to get free if you look around), there's a number of issues which are better dealt with by a professional.

I would have said that at the worst case, the house would be re-possessed if you default, in which case the mortgage would be paid off and any charges would be covered by the equity - if you are going to go down this route (after legal advise), speak to the mortgage company first so they are aware of the situation - that may help with regards your position in future. Your ex is probably correct that the court would possibly expect you to help provide a roof for your daughter, but they might not be too impressed by your ex giving up her job, and your ex may also not be too impressed with the housing the council provide - depends on what they have available, if anything.

You could also ask the CSA to take your case with regards to maintenance - it will be 15% of your takehome and that is the extent of your liability, and in fact, your credit card/loan may be taken into account to reduce this.

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(@Nannyjane)
Joined: 13 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 5426

Hi there and welcome 🙂

It might be a good idea to remind your ex that getting a council house isnt that easy! For a start if she has purposely given up her job and defaulted on her mortgage on purpose then they will consider that she has made herself willingly homeless and she will not be entitled to housing. Also if they do accept that she is homeless, the likelyhood is that they would put her in a homeless hostel or a B&B initially. These are generally very unpleasant places, especially hostels where she may find herself having to mix with the kind of people she may not prefer to mix with! Councils have a selection of private housing stock available to them to place people too, these are generally in the poorer parts of town. If she is going to be relying on housing benefit, then the better private rental properties will be out of her reach financially. In any event she probably wont get a house, she will probably get a 2 bed flat.
The Council will also ask if she has family and as she has stayed with her parents then they would also consider this as an aption for her and again, not rush to house her.
I know this because my daughter has an 18 month baby and is a single parent. She has been served an eviction on her current rental because the property has been sold. Its in the tenancy agreement, that if sold then she would have 2 months to vacate. She approached our local council and was told that she must ignore the eviction notice and squat until the landlord gets a court warrant to remove her. When she objected and told them she would lose her deposit of £700 and be blacklisted, and questioned the morality of such an action, they told her if she didnt do this then she was making herself willingly homeless and they wouldnt then help her anyway! They told her that in any event, she could only expect a flat and also talked about some of the private stock they have access to for tenants in urgent need., horrid little terraced houses in the worse part of town. So, in my experience getting a council house is fraught with difficulties!

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 actd
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(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11890

Hi NJ - that's appalling behaviour by the council - has your daughter been to her MP about this, especially since the law on squatting has just been changed.

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(@Nannyjane)
Joined: 13 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 5426

Hi actd

Oh yes, our MP has been informed and he has already got back to us. He has contacted the Chief Executive and asked for his input! All sorts of grovelling will probably ensue! 😆

My daughter has found another private rental thank goodness...it cost me £150 in Agency fees and I'll have to come up with one months rent as a deposit plus the first months rent....thats £1190!!! My daughter is owed £700 deposit from the tenancy she is leaving but that can take a month or more to find its way back to us. She'll give me that when she gets it, and the first months rent when she gets that! I really dont know how she would manage otherwise....I despair of the way things are going for our young people, there will be many out there that dont have any parental back up, or whos parents wouldnt be able to afford to help...its an awful state of affairs. 🙁

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 actd
Registered
(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11890

yes, I agree. My son was looking to buy a flat on a key worker scheme - we worked out that he could manage the mortgage and I was going to lend him the necessary 5% deposit (I'd borrow at 0% for a year on a credit card) and everything seemed fine, until the mortgage company noticed that he had a student loan, at which point the required deposit went from 5% to 15% and put the flat completely out of his reach - so much for a degree putting you in a better position.

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