Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
As admin know had a hearing last july, at that hearing they gave me 3 tasks to do, one was to enrol on a parenting programme, the other was to go on a domestic violence course due to the nasty texts i sent to the mother and her family and the 3rd i take a drugs test..they gave me 5 months to get atleast halfway thru these things.
...i couldnt get on a parenting course cos scarlett was to young, in order for me to be accepted i need contact with daughter for the course to benefit me, and as i havent seen her for a yr they wouldnt let me enrol.
Due to me moving around alot i couldnt get the funding for the domestic violence course from CAFCASS, they did find me 3 placements but due to unforseen circumstances i was always on the move, so they said they didnt trust id be in the same place long enough to complete the course This course is £78 a session and i need to do 28, plus i need to get to central london to attend it and i live in Berkshire.
And id fail a drugs test cos im a prat, i have no excuses on that front but the other two were very difficult to go through with and i struggled from the offset
The judge adjourned it for another 56 days..any advice on what to do next?. She was understanding about my plight with the DVPP course and she said atleast enrol on one, but i cant afford the £100 with travel every single week.
If you want to be brutal please do as i am the same when giving advice...anybody know what the best steps to make would be?? maybe make another application or just try my hardest with this application as the judge advised and see where im at in the next hearing? Cafcass has now closed their case on this, but in my next hearing if i get myself a DVPP placement can the judge ask them to step in and help for funding again?.
Paul
Hi There,
.
By the sounds of it, you know that you haven't done what you should have done with respect of drugs, This is down to you and you need to address it, if you are struggling then you need to speak to your GP who may be able to help, but honestly if you are serious about seeing your daughter then you need to address this as even if you get the other aspects done you are still going to have this hanging over you. The judge may have given you a set amount of time to sort half of these things out, but they are going to want them all sorted at the end of it.
.
If you aren't able to enrol on the parenting course due to thier restrictions (which I haven't heard before) then the judge should accept this.
.
With the DV course you just need to comit to this, and sort out a way that you can attend.
.
As above being honest, you need to commit to all of these things if you want to see your daughter, they may be difficult with your situation, but you need to commit to getting them done.
.
GTTS
Hi, thanks for your response i do appreciate it.
The drugs situation is my own doing i get that and i have not tried to say otherwise, but the other two factors are simply not possible. Cafcass has withdrawn their help and the family course is not possible as i need contact with my daughter. You said i need to do these things but its not as easy as you think it is.
But thanks.
Paul
Well you don't need me to tell you what you already know you need to do yourself.
The Court asked me to do everything what has been asked of you apart from the DV course. It was an absolute ball ache but what's got to be done has to be done to be part of your child's life end of story.
It was [censored] on earth but I knocked my 20 year drug addiction on the head by going complete cold turkey it wasn't pretty but I'm so pleased I did not only for my daughter but now I feel like a new man! I attended a parenting course as instructed my that shower of **** Cafcass and the court which was every wednesday for 3 months my boss nearly had an heart attack when I told him I had to do it! My baby wasn't even 1 years old and they let me on the course and trust me it wasn't nice been stuck with 10 chavy mums for 12 weeks!
At the end of the day it's time to man up, grow a pair, grow up, bite the bullet and just get everything you need to do done.
All the best
Slim 🙂
Hi Mr Slim
Ye sure i get what your saying,
Thanks again
Paul
Agree with the above.
Get as much done as you can. What you can't get done, get written evidence of refusal to show to the court.
If you make a new application, that's also going to cost money and the court will likely give you short shrift if you haven't got your act together.
Contact your GP to sign up to a local detox course, they're usually free and you can evidence that you're quitting whatever drugs you have been taking.
At the end of the day, it's your child and your case. You need to do whatever you can to get through it.
All the best
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.