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I am currently being ordered to pay child maintenance payments in respect of my 21-year-old daughter and I know that there are other parents and new families being ordered to make payments in respect of 'children' in excess of that age. To me it seems absurd that a parent can be forced to make payments to support children of that age. I firmly believe that once the child becomes an adult that those tension creating strings that have kept you attached to your ex-spouse since your separation/divorce can finally be severed once and for all and you have the opportunity to develop a much healthier relationship with your children. My separation dates back ten years but I am still being pursued through the courts for maintenace payments by my ex-wife in respect of my daughter who is currently attending university. My daughter is 21 years of age and my relationship with her is now non-existant. I have no legal right to know what she is doing or how she is progressing.
Please don't get me wrong. I am not a parent looking to simply get away with supporting my daughter. If it had not been for the courts and their persistant threats and ongoing action against me and my new partner I truly believe without a shadow of a doubt that I would still have a healthy father/daughter relationship with my daughter. I think what I want is the opportunity to be a father rather than feeling like and being treated as a criminal who is simply there to provide nothing but financial support.
What do you consider to be a rightful age after which a parent should no longer have to endure court actions to have to pay child maintenance to support their adult children?
Hi there and thanks for you post - I will forward this to our legal experts who will be able to help you. This may take a couple of days but bear with us
In the mean time have a look at the site - there are some great articles on here
Mario
As for the vote, the think it's reasonable to pay until a first degree is obtained (so kestrel wouldn't be paying while his daughter catches up on missed lectures, and they can't keep taking degrees and being maintained) or until they leave to get a job - whichever comes first.
I guess there are many different scenarios but I think there's a difference between what is assumed to be reasonable and what should be enforceable by a court. As a father I obviously feel it would be reasonable to support your child in any way you can for as long as it takes. In fact, with the experiences of my own parents, there doesn't ever come a time when you cease supporting your children. What I object to is the court telling me that I must support my 21-year-old daughter simply because I am no longer part of the family home. Whatever the underlying reasons for that, I'm still that child's father so what's the difference?
British people fight for freedom of speech, freedom to roam and come and go as we please, we live in what is regarded as a democracy, yet we are governed by rules such as this which limit and restrict how we go about our lives. I'm over 50 years of age and I'm not free to do as I please. I don't have any rights in this matter and yet I'm not guilty of any crime. I have undergone a divorce, an often painful experience at the best of times, and I only ask for parity with those fathers who have been fortunate enough not to have had to endure that.
Yep I agree - my parents (and sister & brother in law) have provided support for me, so it doesn't stop, BUT they are doing this because they want to, not because a court tells them to.
I think there are circumstances where you should be reasonably expected to provide for your children beyond the normal age - but only your own children.
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