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[Solved] advice please


Posts: 1
Registered
Topic starter
(@rizzlablu)
New Member
Joined: 13 years ago

i have a two year old son and his mum is stoping me from seeing him cos we had a fight so she sent me a lawyers letter the other day saying she wants mimin contact from me and saids she still wants me to see my son but lied saying i dont anwser fone to her and im abuseive to her and she wants respect and to watch my behaver, so i went and got a lawyer to ask for overnite stays and dates and times be set up so i can see him lawyer sent letter on friday so her lawyer wont get it untill next week , but i havent seen my son for over a week and miss him alot cos she said in a text not to contact her unless its though a lawyer so thats what im doin but she has txted my mum and said if i want my son for sunday to contact her , this is where i need the advice i dont trust her and feel she trys to glot me into saying something, should i contact her to see my son or just wait untill the lawyer sorts out dates and times ? i dont know what to do cos i really want to see my son 🙁 any help is needed thanks

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2 Replies
Registered
(@goonergaj)
Joined: 13 years ago

Eminent Member
Posts: 36

Aww bless you! I really feel for you because my hubby, as many dads on here, is in kind of the same situation.

It's tricky because on one hand she wants everything to be handled legally and the next she's offering you a visit. My advice would be to tread very carefully she sounds highly unreasonable, like most women in these kinds of situations do, and you're right she could be trying to set you up in a situation that makes you look bad. At the end of the day it sounds very much like she's angry with you and she's not happy with the way you address her etc etc, and there is no real mention from her anything to do with your son, which suggests to me that her issue is not really anything to do with the child you share, just her feelings towards the strained relationship between you and her.

Is there any chance that as she texted your mum that she [mum] may be able to act as a go-between, i.e. your son gets dropped off there? Because as much as you miss your little boy it's likely that he's missing you too. Or could your mum just be present while your ex drops him off/you pick him up, whatever the situation, just so you're not really put in the situation where there could be a negative outcome for you? If the answer to all of those is no, then sadly I'd suggest that you just wait on the solicitor. Also when you next speak to the solicitor I'd ask them to liase mediation with your ex's solicitor as a way of moving forward. As, to me, she sounds very unreasonable, I wouldn't expect it to be solved with just those few letters - you may be in for a long battle (but hopefully not) just be prepared. If you're entitled to legal aid then carry on as you are with your solicitor but if you're not I'd suggest going it on your own, there is lots of help and advice on here for you to follow - a couple of guides at the top of the legal section and if you get in touch with any of the moderators they can point you in the direction of the CCLC, who can talk you through the legal side of things.

Stay strong and don't give up the fight. Best wishes and keep us informed as to how it's all going for you.

Teri 🙂

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(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11890

Hi and welcome

I would really recommend that you do everything through your solicitor, or at least ask your solicitor's advice before doing anything on your own - if you do anything that goes wrong, then it could make your case that much harder.

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