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Hi everybody,
I have an upcoming section 7 due to be completed over the next 4-6 weeks. Delayed due to the CAFCASS officer been off work with a bereavement. CAFCASS wrote to the court and asked for a 8 week delay, which of course I wasn’t happy about.
a brief overview;
Broke up with the ex when she was 15 weeks pregnant. She cut all contact and even moved out of the town. Didn’t tell me the baby was born or she was moving. I wasn’t on the birth certificate and she didn’t allow me to meet my daughter (who is 9 months old now). At the second hearing I got an interim order allowing me 2 hours a week. I had to agree to ex been present as she claimed in court she breast feeds every hour and baby has separation anxiety. Finally got to meet my daughter when she was 6 months old. Ex made loads of allegations to CAFCASS, the usual drugs, drinks, abuse. She reported me to the police several times while the legal proceedings are ongoing (police never even spoke to me once). Never made any reports or allegations at the time of the so called abuse. Personally I think she wanted me out the way so she could do everything her own way and a lot comes down to her own mental health issues and wanting the baby all to herself. There is no evidence of any of her allegations, I completed a hair sample test for drink and drugs which come back clear. The ex is doing everything she can to stop me from getting unsupervised contact. All the excuses under the sun, breastfeeding, separation anxiety, saying the baby can’t travel in a car (although she has no problem when she is doing it). She gives me the 2 hours to satisfy the order and that is it. Not a minute over, and half of the time the baby sleeps through the hour. This has happened to many times for it to be a coincidence.
When I have my section 7 interview I don’t know whether I should bring up with CAFCASS my ex’s previous claims of abuse. These are against her own parents and she blames all her mental health issues on this abuse, it wasn’t sexual just emotional. The trouble is I don’t believe she was ever abused by her parents. I think maybe they weren’t the best parents but she is one of six children and all her brothers and sisters say it is my ex been a drama queen. She has only mentioned this a couple of times when drunk and story has changed each time. Her mother is around my daughter all the time which is another reason I am doubting her claims [especially after all the lies she has made up about me]. Would it benefit me if CAFCASS could see that she has made false allegations before? She has her own issues and has mentioned her allegations to a doctor so there will be a record of it cause she will definitely deny it. I brought up her mental health issues during the initial CAFCASS interview but nothing was ever looked into. They seemed more focused on me. Either way if my ex denies the abuse happened, it means she has lied about abuse before. If she carries on with the story it means she has allowed someone who abuse her around our daughter. I don’t know if CAFCASS would speak to her mother but if they did she would also say it didn’t happen which in turn means her daughter has lied about it.
my ex has also made false allegations to social Servives before about her friends baby when they fell out and her friend stopped her seeing her baby. CAFCASS are also unaware of this point. All that was said in court is that she was known to social Servives and no details were given.
I know my ex is going to spent her whole section 7 interview stating why I shouldn’t be allowed unsupervised contact. She will not have one good word to say about me. I don’t know how to approach my interview, I think it would help my case if CAFCASS were made aware of these facts.
I appreciate the advice in advance.
Hi,
For your S7 interview it's best.to be child-focused. Be the better and reasonable parent and just talk about whats best for child, how you can meet childs needs. Tell them how you want contact to progress as 2 hours a week is very little time to bond with child.
I recommend you go on cafcass site and complete parenting plan. Mention it to them and that will help and show that your child focused.
As Bill has said, just stay focused on your child. they don't really take it well if you spend the time slagging off your ex. There is no problem in raising your concerns regarding her mental health. Just explain to them you will want to be involved with the childs upbringing and you would like to establish a relationship with them. The fact they are so young may make it difficult to get any sort of overnight stays at this point. Good luck with it all.
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