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Isnt that shocking that you have to spend £500 just so you can spend time with your own flesh and blood ?!
When that kinda money could be spent ON your child instead !
The system is a disgrace along with these wicked mothers who only see there children as possessions and weapons to be used against the father !
t all has to change... It really does !!!
With thanks to kennymac......This sentiment really should echo loudly on this forum.
Tel.
Not trying to belittle your comment about £500. By the time I've got more than a day every 3 weeks I will have spent £10k.
I'm only trying for 2 days every 3 weeks & some time over Christmas.
It costs me £100 for fuel every time I see him and around 12 hours driving.
I'm not trying to say that £500 is cheap, any amount of money to spend time with your own flesh & blood is a disgrace. But I'm sure that fathers have had to pay more than £10k for access.
In fact, if dad.info people are happy to share, what has it cost the rest of you?
Between Oct 2009 to self-representing in 2012 I racked up a legal bill of over £9000 (still owe a considerable chunk of that) and since I started self-representing its cost me a further £200 to enforce the order she’s broken…..£90 to apply to have the penalties enforced (Committal application) and I’ve still got to find £150+Vat to pay a Process Server to serve her these papers!
(I so wish I’d heard of this site back in 2009 I’d not be in the financial mess I am!)
All these costs are at my expense because she’s made false allegations / lied (all proven lies in court) and every time she breaks the order I have to find the money to take her back to court!!!
You know if you failed to pay your rent / council tax / other bills……you would be taken to court, fined and made to pay their costs! If you failed to pay them you’d be visited by the bailiffs….if you still continued to refuse to Pay up and break court orders you’d eventually be looking at prison or suspended prison sentences, community service etc…etc…
Based on this why do most ex’s get no come-back for their contempt of court orders?
We fathers are easy targets…why? Just for wanting to keep being a part of our children’s lives we are made to pay emotionally and financially while the ex’s sit around doing and saying what they want just to make you pay more and more….i’m not saying all financially…I mean being made to pay in the “revenge” sense….emotionally.
I used to think to myself how can a father just walk away from his children and not have anything to do with them…...now I see yes there are many out there that do just that (so called dead-beat dads!) …….but how many simply cannot fight their ex’s lies…how many do not know how to fight their ex’s ..….how many are not strong enough to fight day in day out for the right to see their kids grow up….only to be continually blocked from seeing their kids so the mother can get more benefits.
Its time the children really did get rights to have both parents made equal in their lives…….it takes two people to create a child not one….but it seems it take just one to lie and scheme to get revenge on the father for leaving them/cheating on them etc…
Fathers have very little rights in family separation so it seems compared to mothers!
I strongly disagree with that term dead-beat dad. Most fathers would do anything for their children.
Does anyone know if unreasonable behaviour is demonstrated by unhelpful ex-partners can you claim the costs back at their expense in the same way as is divorce?
I think we have to leave it to karma.. 🙂
Id love to know if there is a way to claim back........
Regards,
Dave
my ex's unreasonable behaviour has been given in CAFCASS reports, Police reports and by the judge's judgements....and yes i've asked for my costs to be reimubrsed at each hearing....i've not had one penny reimbursed yet....and i'm not holding my breath on ever seeing a penny back from her!
whats funny is that if you were a celebrity slandered in the papers and you took the paper to court and proved they slandered you...you'd be compensated for damages.....why should that not be the same for you and me when we prove our ex's liars and deceptive in court!!
Yes you can ask for costs. I cant remember a case where they have been granted though!! However, I guess the Courts don't reimburse costs because the Resident Parent cant afford...LOL! Perhaps they should start and it may make RPs think twice!!
...but that would be favouring the NRP which is usually the Dad.....and they cant be doing that, god forbid!!!
depends on what you call a success story - my legal costs were 40k (and that was after a 20% discount for a family connection, and totally separate to the 8k in divorce costs a couple of years prior) plus a 90k extension on the house to accommodate my kids, which only added 50k to the value - but I got custody of my daughters and very restrictive contact between my youngest and her mother (my older daughter refused to have contact, which was accepted by the court) - so almost 90k loss in total. But I'd do it again without hesitation, so yes, there are successes even at a cost.
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