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I've been reading many posts on this forum and find the answers very helpfull.
I will give you a very vague background as to my case for contact/residence for my 12 month old son.
I am 48 with the only one son,I know I started late in life.The relationship ended with his mother when he was just 7 weeks old,it had been coming for a very long time. Ever since that contact with my son has been horrendous with me having to virtually beg to see him and have him overnight,which I have on many occasions. It resulted in court action and a interim contact order placed 21/12/2012 for 2 over nights per week and extra days on my holidays. i thought that would be the end of the matter,but as you can image that was just the start,she constantly breached the order stating i had breached the preamble,which I had not,my dogs would not be in the same house and my partner not be around "Her" son. ( She has broken 19 out of 26 contacts)
I took it back to court in front of a district judge and he upheld the order and told mother contact must take place. No chance she did it again this time stating my dogs are causing the baby to have an allergy resulting in conjunctivitis. She states he comes back covered in cuts and bruises,constantly come back with scabies!! you name it he gets it.
She is always taking him to the hospital after my visits claiming some type of injury.
Last week in front of a judge for enforcement hearing the allergy claims came up again so the judge "erred on the side of caution" and stopped all overnight stays and forbid me from bringing my baby home untill a S7 is completed.
I have the most loving and clean home that you can imagine and I have now had a written letter for courts stating that his ongoing conjunctivitis could be caused by a simple blocked tear duct. its written that he show no allergy reactions at all.If it is an allergy then Dr states that this can be simply treated with drops. So all i get now is 3 hours every when ever she feels like letting me see him.
i am desperate to get back to court to submit this gp letter that the judge requested to get my overnights reinstated and I have also filled for residency.
The mother has 4 other children by 2 fathers and has done the exact same to them.i have spoken at great lengths to both.
I really feel that the mother has underlying mental issues that needs to be addressed.I have informed social services and the police,as she assaulted me with the baby in her arms and two of her children watching on,the judge wasn't interested in that at the hearing !!
I really don't know where to turn to get someone in authority to listen to my concerns about his mothers capabilities of looking after my baby. From first hand experience I know and have witnessed her constantly hitting her children as she does not know how to cope with them and that's her answer to everything,Lashout !
I do apologize if this has gone on a bit but its things i need to get off my chest. I'm now desperately trying to do a position statement and would like some guidance on that if at all possible.
Thanks
Andrew
Hi Andru 🙂
I think you have a good case, just keep at it! 😉 I feel you will get your overnight stays back once the objections on health grounds are dispelled.
I've got to be honest with you I'm not sure you have enough to get Residency though. There has to be serious abuse and courts really loathe splitting up siblings...it does happen as my sons case illustrates but its uncommon.
There is a sticky at the top of the Legal Eagle section called "A Guide to Representing yourself in Court" and you will find an example of a Position statement there. The Custody Minefield also have templates for all sorts of documents which can be purchased for a couple of pounds. I used this one when I did my sons Position Statement. Heres a link -
www.thecustodyminefield.com/mobile/FamilyLawMenu.html
Heres another example which is ok and I used this for the first Position Statement I did, my McKenzie Friend preferred the Custody Minefield template though, but they are both usable.
www.docstoc.com/docs/121207197/Template-for-a-Position-Statement
Thanks for the reply and advice. I do have very serious concerns about her mental state and her ability to look after 5 children with the scenes I have witnessed. The parental alienation that has happened with her previous children has damaged them to the extent that the eldest one (who was 15 at the time) told me he actually wanted to kill his father for walking out on him,when I know that is simply not true. he fought through the courts to see them and her hostility was incredible,resulting on her assaulting him also. She has at least 6 PPD1's against her to say the least.
I just hope i can do whats best for my little one and give him a normal upbringing where a daily smack around the head is not the norm.
My mistake slightly it is a PPD1 form.
Its where police inform social services when the are allegations of domestic abuse and children may be at risk.Each of these where raised after my ex either assaulted or abused her former ex partners.
"While PPD1 notifications from the police are not referrals the information they contain needs to be evaluated against other information that Children’s Services might have about the child and their family and need to be managed with appropriate priority."
Have you spoken to Childrens Services about your concerns and the physical abuse the children suffer. You can prove she is violent because of the police reports. You will get your chance to bring up your concerns and the risks of harm to your child and the other children too when they or CAFCASS begin to compile the Section 7 report. They will want to see your home I would think, and they should get reports from any agencies that have had involvement with your ex. Always try and remain calm and reasonable and dont bad mouth the mother, just present the facts. If there are drink or drugs involved you can request she be tested.
It might be helpful if you can get witness statements from the other fathers.
I have spoken to the social services about my concerns and I have also a taped recording of her admitting it to me which i passed onto the social services but apart from doing "A child in need" for her eldest son they have turned a blind eye.
I welcome S7 report as that will give me the opportunity to show and inform them of my concerns. I welcome the home inspection too as this will show where my baby will be staying.I have been advised not to bad mouth mother and thats one thing I won't do.
I have a great number of messages from one of her former partners that totally mirrors whats she doing to me including the assaults and harassment and verbal abuse.
I'm not sure if to submit it as in the last few months she has allowed the father to start to see his son,only after I started court action against her,I don't want to ruin this dads new relationship with his son that he hadn't seen for 3 1/2 years due to her hostility.
Thats a decision only you can make, but I totally respect your compassion for the other father and the child involved. Perhaps you can ask whoever does the report at your home if you can speak to them confidentially, show them the txts but ask them not to speak of them in their report. It will at least give them a flavour of what you have been having to put up with....just a thought. 🙂
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