[Solved] 1st hearing

I am in a similar situation to you, my 1st court hearing is in the very near future, so I understand how you feel. I also considered representing myself, but due to the nature of the allegations against me I feel as though initially it would be better to take legal advise. It is expensive, but initially you can get half an hour free consultation, you could try and seek advise this way, and explain your circumstances. It is worth trying, you must look at all the ways you can to try and be represented to best of your ability. This information was given to me in a recent topic it may help
If you're going to self rep and need legal advice you can telephone Coram Children's Legal Centre, also visit their web site it is full of great information.

Hope this helps a little.

Thanks for the advice, I definitely can't afford help and have to do it myself. I've no allegations against me yet, but no doubt will have some thrown at me.

I've tried mediation, received some free solicitor advice via the mediator, but my ex partner refused to consider talking about the advice, so I filed a C100 to get it sorted out.

Good luck with your hearing, it's the not knowing what happens that I'm trying to prepare for.

Go it alone don't bother with a Solicitor they just muddy the waters and financially destroy you dragging it out for months more than needed.

It's pretty straight forward and once you have got the first hearing out the way your confidence will grow I actually ended up enjoying the actual court hearings.

The ex will throw loads of false allegations at you but they all do and the courts have heard it a million times over I'm just going to copy and paste the little guide I done on representing yourself and the first hearing, this is it.......
Hey Guy's, I thought I'd write a guide on self representing in Court as when you are barred from your Child your head is absolutely all over the place and you feel like you have nowhere to turn I wish someone could of pointed me in the right direction.

Now I will only tell you about my experience and neither I or my ex had Solicitors (thank the lord)

So first and for most more than likely Mediation has failed you have been issued with your FM1 form from the Mediator which enables you to make an application to court.

You have filled out your C100 form and received your first Court hearing date, this will be called a "Directions Hearing" and that's basically a hearing when the Judge or Magistrates will Direct which way the case will go and make an Order for the next hearing.

Now if there is mention of any abuse towards your ex or your Child, Cafcass will become involved who basically represent the Child and their only concern is for the Child.

You may have received a Telephone call from them which they produced an S2 report for the Court at the Directions hearing and they will be a court Cafcass officer present during the hearing.

So the day has arrived for your first hearing it will seem very daunting indeed but you have to go in there prepared, find out the Address of the Court before hand and make sure you plan your route arrive as early as you can. Take with you money for parking, Food and Coffee.

Make sure you are looking the muts nuts too, Clean shaven, smart suit but a shirt and tie will suffice and what ever you don't do what I did and buy some new shoes and not wear them in, honestly I couldn't walk for 2 weeks after with 6 50p size blisters on my feet! lol

As I said arrive early get the security to tell you where the usher is and they will direct you to where your court hearing will be and what time if they're running late or whatever.

Be nice to absolutely everyone you meet you will be treated with the upper most respect so make sure you return it I can't stress this enough you do not want to be seen in a bad light at all, If your EX is in the waiting room Ignore her completely maybe a nod but thats it as it could kick off and you don't want that.

When you enter the court room you and your ex will sit at the back you will have a court legal adviser or clerk of the court one side then a Cafcass officer the other and in front of you the Judges or Magistrates.

What your body language don't interupt anyone ever you WILL be given your chance to speak when your ex starts unleashing all the lies and false allegations DO NOT REACT in any way don't shake your head nothing remain cool calm and composed at all times.

Remain extra cool when the Cafcass officer speaks you will not agree with one thing they say but as before keep cool and calm these people hold more weight in court than anyone so don't pi** them off no matter what you do they will and can make or break everything.

The hearing may seem all against you but don't lose heart it may be the same at the next hearing but thinks will start to turn your way as the case goes on trust me.

I found it all so daunting but when I got in the Court room I found I started to enjoy it and I still do it's been the hardest 6 months since I started the fight and they has been some serious lows and only a few highs but in a strange way I feel I'm a better person for it there's something liberating standing up there and fighting for your flesh and blood be warned though it is a bit of a roller coaster of emotions but you will get there.

Now the outcome for me was that I got a terrible report off Cafcass they basically believed every lie my ex came out with and I got nailed by them but they did recommend I be part of my Childs life.

The Court ordered I do a drug test, attend a SPIPS course and I had to produce a letter from my GP to say I went to see him to give up my Drug addiction then they arranged a review hearing in 3 months.

So all in all I'd say go for it self representing it really isn't as daunting as you think I am way further on that anyone I know with a Solicitor and never ever give up the fight.

Good luck

Slim 🙂

Thank you mate. All the advice I get helps me prepare mentally for what is coming. Cheers

These links may help you to understand the process

https://www.justice.gov.uk/downloads/family-justice-reform/pd-12b-cap.pdf

http://www.judiciary.gov.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Child-Arrangements-Programme-Flowchart.pdf

And I've copied and pasted this from Mr Slim sticky post.

Today was awesome and a massive learning curve it's shown me that the way I have approached everything has been spot on so here's a few pointers of how to conduct yourself throughout a Family Court case.

BE YOURSELF

Don't try to be something or someone your not there's some very clever people in the courts and they will see straight through you they've seen and dealt with every joker under the sun so don't be one of them.

TELL THE TRUTH

Don't lie EVER it's not worth it as above the courts have seen it all before if you do you will need a very good memory and every action or thing you say could come back to bite you in the [censored] it's also very self satisfying knowing you haven't lied your conscience will always be clear.

YOU CANNOT BEAT THE SYSTEM

If you try it will come down on you like a tonne of bricks it can't be done just don't let it beat you.

BE CHILD FOCUSED

After all this is why your there in the first place the whole system is set up with the childs best interests at heart and the law states that every child has the right to BOTH parents in their lives and the the courts stick to this like glue so if you come across as just trying to get one over your ex then they will weed you out.

SEVER ALL CONTACT AND COMMUNICATION WITH THE EX

This is a tough one if your getting endless abuse by text phone call FB messages ect then your best plan of action is to delete them change your phone number do not contact the ex at all outside the court, this was one of the hardest thing to do for me as my ex is obviously the mother of my child and I wanted to keep in contact to find out how my Girls were when I realised my ex was just trying to get me done for harassment and was using my Girls as weapons a Police officer told me to cut all contact as thats what the ex was up to they can slap a non mol on you these days at the drop of a hat and pretty much any text be seen as harassment so be careful.

DO A BULLET PROOF BUNDLE

A bundle is a lot easier to compile than you think and it is pretty straight forward once you get into it mine reads like a story it's basically just something which is easily referable to in court when you are arguing your case all your applications go in there, cafcass reports a chronology of events, a position statement, expert reports drug test results and any certificates of proof that you've attended courses ordered by the courts ect you can band in a section for supporting evidence things like photos, birthday and fathers day cards ect. I will do a how to do a bundle guide shortly it puts you in good stead for the court and it gets it straight in your head what you are actually in court for, start doing one early as possible then you wont have a mission to do towards the end of the case.

DO A BULLET PROOF POSITION STATEMENT

As above it's worth doing a position statement as early as poss it's basically just a brief outline of the history between you and your ex and how you've come to be at court, drop in your concerns if you have any and list your requests to the court basically tell them why you took out the application if you want PR for your child children and what contact you would like to have, again I'll knock up a little how to do a position statement guide in the near future.

CONCENTRATE ON YOUR ACTIONS

Do not worry about what your ex is doing concentrate on yourself if your ex is breaking the order ect don't worry about it just keep your nose clean be whiter than white and never be on the back foot.

JUMP THROUGH ALL THE HOOPS AND TICK ALL THE BOXES

Whatever the court ask you or order you to do DO IT no ifs or buts if it feels beneath you then just crack on swallow your pride and do it for your flesh and blood it will be worth it in the long run trust me, try to preempt everything too if the Cafcass reports say I think the applicant needs to do a parenting course go and find one and beat them to it.This worked wonders for me.

GIVE UP YOUR ADDICTIONS

Whether it's Drink, Weed, Coke, Speed seek advice and give it up as if you ex knows or gets wind of it it will be used against you, even if you smoke a bit of weed you will be considered a crack head in the courts they are so behind with the times it's untrue, if you can go cold turkey do it otherwise go and see your GP speak to a drugs help group it will be worth it in the long run trust me.

BE NICE TO EVERYONE

This is a tough one and I struggle with it big time but it's paid dividends be nice to everyone in court, the mediator, solicitors, cafcass, contact centre staff, the court office staff EVERYONE people have long memories so be polite and well mannered throughout the whole case.

Happy hearings

Mr Slim 🙂