Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
I am separated from my wife but still living together and sorting out finances, paying off debts before we physically separate.
Question is how much spousal maintenance should we agree on, trying to agree on this ourselves. She is reasonable about things and about paying me something as I will have almost nothing to live on (£250 to buy food, entertainment, kids stuff per month) when I move out, but I don’t know how much I will need to live on per month and what is a reasonable amount to ask for? Any help please.
I earn 22,500 pa 1500 net per months and my ex earns around 6kpa but with her what will be universal credit, carers allowance and higher rate dla for one of our children, middle rate for the other plus child benefit she will have a net per month of 3150 per month. She can’t work more hours because will lose carers allowance and needs to look after our ASD kids.
Our bills will be roughly the same for each separate house but she will be paying the life insurance policy for us both, and the home insurance at around £120pm, obviously she will also pay for upkeep of the house while she is living there with the children. I won’t have any money to give towards that anyway or I’d be left with pretty much zero.
kids will be at mine Friday to Sunday two weeks on, one week off and two dinners every week during week. She will be the main carer.
What’s fair in this situation do you think? Have no idea where to start.
hi,
it's good to hear that your both trying to reach agreements mutually. I would suggest you use a budgeting app/website to work out your monthly incomings and outgoings.
there is one here: https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/debt-and-money/budgeting/budgeting/work-out-your-budget/
many banking apps include a budgeting feature. see if your bank offers one. Have you had discussions about child maintenance? if that's going to be separate to spousal support, then would be wise to factor that in.
take a look at this guide to spousal maintenance: https://www.mediateuk.co.uk/guide-to-spousal-maintenance/
I hope you can come to an agreement that's reasonable/affordable, and without the need to fight about it in court.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.