[Solved] My wife refuses mediation

Hi there

I'm not really up on the divorce side of things, someone with more knowledge should be along soon to help. Here's a link to guidelines from Advice Now. About divorce without a lawyer, you and your wife might find it useful

http://www.advicenow.org.uk/guides/how-get-divorce-or-end-civil-partnership-without-help-lawyer

Best of luck

And another...

http://www.advicenow.org.uk/file/2317/download?token=h4jkNORG

Advicenow have a whole heap of information sheets about divorce and Wikivorce.com is a really good resource for all matters divorce too.

Thanks

Hi There,
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With your name on the mortgage, there are a few things you can do.
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She could remortgage and give you the percentage of the equity that you agree, whilst she couldn't afford to do this at the moment, that option won't be the best, though that said she could possibly remortgage for the amount owing on the existing mortgage, and you have an agreement of a percentage of equity that she will pay you at a later date possibly when the children reach 18, she re marries, or moves a new partner in. If she only has to re mortgage for a lower amount that may become an option.
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Otherwise, you can keep the mortgage as it is with yours and her name on it, the issue with this option is that you are still legally liable for the payments, if you were to pay half of the mortgage whilst your name is still on it, then your percentage of equity should reflect that if the house price goes up or down. If you are looking to stop paying towards the mortgage, then the equity you agree on, would be based on the current market value as it stands. The biggest issue you have is that if she defualts on the payments (if you stop paying half) then the mortgage company will come to you for the shortfall and if it can't be paid then you will risk losing the house.
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My knowledge of divorce law and finances aren't too bad so any questions just ask, I'm not legally trained but have ex[erience of my own divorce and helping others through thiers. If any questions are sensitive then feel free to send me a private message.
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GTTS

Thanks for the advice GTTS.

My concerns are I currently am only able to pay maintenance and not make any contributions to the mortgage.
I have worked out that I have about £50,000 of equity owing to me based on a 60/40 split in her favour as I realise the court will award her more based on her being primary parent.

My eldest is only just 7 and my wife is trying to negotiate that I don't receive my share until my daughter is 21.
That is some 14 years away and as you know £50k then will not hold the same value as its will do today.

I have no other invested monies such as pensions savings so I want to start and invest this money know for my future and my childrens future.

If she's trying to get this held until your daughter is 21, then you want to keep a percentage of the equity, rather than a fixed 50k - that way your share will increase in line with house prices. You'd also need to ensure that it's written into the agreement that she has to buy you out by a certaib date or thhat the house would have to be sold, and also a way to agree on the valuation at the time if she did want to buy you out.

Hi There,
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I agree that you should be looking at a percentage rather than an amount set for exactly the reasons that actd has said if the house price raises then so does the amount that you recieve.
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I would get some legal advice though, if I understand it right, then effectively if you aren't paying towards the morgage for the next 14 years then I'm not sure if you have a claim on any increase of equity through a percentage split.
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For example if say you have 100k equity in the property at this point, if the price of the house increases over the next 14 years then so does the equity, but also you have to concider that your ex is slowly paying off the mortgage over that 14 years which will also increase the equity.
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It's slightly complex, but you may have to propose that your 40% of the equity will only raise by the percentage that the house price has risen if that makes sense (it sort of does in my head Lol)
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Otherwise I can't see your ex agreeing to pay the mortgage on her own increasing the equity and giving you 40% of the total in 14 years.
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GTTS

Should be ok with a percentage increase on the equity, eg if the house is worth 250k and the equity is 100k, (so 40k/60k split) - if your ex pays the mortgage, then when that it paid off, she has £210k equity at that point, and you have 40k - if the house price doubles, she has £420k annd you have £80k - her paying the mortgage will effectivley be her increasing her equity by buying it off the mortgage company, not by reducing yours.