Failed FDR hearing

Two and a half years after the FDA hearing we have finally had the FDR hearing. Her new solicitors are so agressive and blame me for everything. So I was prepared that they would attempt to go down the conduct route. Even though they are in the top 500 they are a law unto themselves. I know that the bar for conduct to be considered is very high and also it has to have had an impact on the family assets. I did have special measures in the court because she does frighten me in an emotional way. We obviously exchanged updated disclosures and i was gobsmacked to see that  to date she has spent £107,000 on legal fees!!!!!She has done everything through her solicitors and her new ones seem charge £3500 a month.So we also exchanged WP offers.I suggested we sell her home and go 50/50 giving us about £380000 each For me that still would not buy me a property in or near our area . The pension report recommended 62% share in my favour. Then her solictors wrote to the pension expert company and asked about calculating  figures for th time we were together. They said that is a new request and it would cost £800 + VAT and we both had to agree. So they wrote to me seeking my permission. I refused as this was not directed in the Order and asked why was this was not included in their first letter of instruction? On the day of the hearing I read that they went to another company without my permission and got the figures. She she offered £150,000, £63000 to cover the pension and she keeps the FMH.

I could not believe it. Knowing her as I do I really do think she knows I cannot do anything other rent a room. I have not idea where my daughter will go and of course our son will stay with her and I really do think she will go back to Court to change the CAO on the grounds that it is in our son's best interest to remain in the FMH. So no agreement was reached. It was agreed we will go to final hearing.

Now she wants us to go to arbitration and sent me three arbitrators to consider. To be honest something does not feel right. So I am going to three of my own because I simply have no faith her legal team. I do think she could have suggested this earlier rather than us attending the FDR Hearing. She will cover the cost for two days.I will propose she also pays my barrister's fees. It will be two days of berating me, and painting a very negative image of me. They are saying I have not given full disclosure and it goes on. 

Monday I will speak to my solictor and get advice. 

I obviously will keep you updated. Right now I am retiring to bed to relax after a really stressful few weeks.