[Solved] social services ripped family apart. help please!

"I'm being advised not to take it to court"

You've been advised by everyone on the forum TO take it to court. Our advice is not pulled out of thin air, it's based on both professional and personal experience and knowledge of children's matters.

If you just want to vent rather than receive advice from us, we have a blogs section that you might find helpful. You could write a diary of all your frustrations which might help you to process what is going on or alternatively, it might help to seek some counselling in the interim so that you have some support and someone to talk to.

If you read enough of the posts to advise me it's best to go to court you know I am already keeping a diary and have been since day 1. Also you would know I have been to counselling. Maybe there is information you are missing to advise me going to court. Maybe your correct in telling me to go to court. However I'm not trying to avoid the court route as I have said I am being advised by professionals not to go to court it just seems you've looked into the fact I am not being given contact so you suggest me to go to court rather than deal with the situation.

I understand you are frustrated, but as Mojo has said to you previously, it's hardly fair to have an attitude with us when every time you have asked for support on this thread, someone has taken the time to reply to you and offer you sound and sensible advice.

I'm suggesting keeping a diary blog or seeking counselling to help you with processing your emotions and frustrations now and have read through all of your posts since you began this thread.

In addition to being a moderator on the forum, I work in the family court with litigants in person on a daily basis and many of our members and moderators who have advised you also have professional or personal knowledge on which to base their advice to you.

There are not set procedures or routes for you to take at present and therefore any advice given to you from FRG or from us, is based on our own knowledge and experience and it's entirely up to you, which route you take.

As previously said, our advice remains the same.

I wish you luck but am regrettably unwilling to answer any further posts on this thread unless a specific new issue arises.

Hi There,
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I haven't commented on this thread for some time, as I realised early on that the advice you were being given by myself and our members didn't sit well with you.
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I stand by exactly what I said from the start though and others have commented similar, I feel your ex has a certain amount of responsibility regarding the issues you are having, whether you believe this or not, if she didn't then she wouldn't have reproted you for harrasment.
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You say you will do anything possible to see your daughter, but you have an option that you won't consider, that's your choice of course, but If I had an option open to see my child I 100% would use it, whether advice from another party said it wasn't the right route or not, the option is there so I would use it along side fighting SS to back down.
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I am also confused as you have said that when you crashed your car it was 2 years ago, and it was over an arguement with your ex about scans, but your daughter is 6 months old now so even with an early scan at 8-10 weeks that car crash would have been well under 18 months ago, unless I'm missing something.
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It's already been said and I am going to reinforce it again, It is unfair of you to come onto the forum asking for advice and then give such attitude to people trying to help you, you have already alienated, one of our most experienced members and they have stated above they will not respond with advice unless it's around a different matter. We are here to help you and offer our experience, some of which is professional based on training and daily working life and some which is just from our own experiences and we have all said the same thing to you, if you don't wish to take this advice that is your choice, but we won't accept the attitude that you have given in your replies. You may not agree with us, but we speak from experience of helping many members over many years. We may not always be 100% right but we advise on the information we have been given.
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If your replies to our advice continue to give such attitude to the members posting, then one of 2 things will happen, you will either find that no one will bother replying to your thread asking for advice, or if your replies to people aren't polite then we have an option to remove you from the forum, the latter is always our last resort as we don't want to turn people away who are in need of advice, but nor do we want people turned off giving advice due to the replies they recieve.
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I do understand how frustrated you feel, but we are trying our hardest to give you some solid advice to work from, if you don't want to take it then that's your choice, but if you aren't agreeing with the advice, then either don't reply to whats been said or be polite in your replies and hopefully you will continue to recieve advice and guidence.
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GTTS

Hi I have been offered a plea bargain by my lawyer. To accept a lesser charge rather than harrassment malicious communications. I still don't think that it is fair for what I have done really, but I just want to no what effect accepting this plea will have in regards to the case of my daughter. Also if I take the plea they want a restraining order on her mum. This will grantee cs are involved for the whole 12 months of this restraining order? All intact if any will be supervised? A conviction against my daughters mum will obviously still have an effect what's the difference between the effect of that and the effect of the harrassment charge. I'm contemplating whether to just go to trial on the harrassment charge but obviously it is something I need to think about.
Thanks.

Effects on contact would be wholly dependent on whether you're asking the court to make a decision or waiting to see what CS say.

A court is likely to order supervised contact in a centre anyway to allow for a period of reintroduction.

In the cases of non-mol orders for example, the court will arrange handovers for contact as best they can inline with any orders.

Your lawyer will be best placed to advise you on the criminal proceedings as we deal with family law.

Just had the hearing accepted the plea bargain of sending one unpleasant message. I received a fine. With this over with and the other accusation dropped I was wondering if anyone knows where this puts me.
Thankyou

I think Yoda's advice above still covers it.

As actd says, all the advice you have been given above still stands.

Your choices are;

1) Pursue through CS

or

2) Apply to court

The latter option is probably the quickest route in our opinions.

Thank you. The main reason I don't want to go straight to court is because u feel like I'm letting the cs get away with how they have treated the case. I had my core meeting yesterday and they even got wrong the reason why they first became involved.. it's laughable.. that on top of everything else if I let them get away with it it isn't fair on the next guy that has to go through what I have because there lazy and don't care about the children that are placed under their plans.

The issues you face are that SS are very unlikely to back down, I would assume that with your plea bargain, you have in effect admited to harrasing your ex, so as far as I can see, that will have given SS further grounds to continue on the route that they have.
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I think your only option would be to fight SS's decision through court for a child arrangement order, I can't see any other way forward, if you go through court and you manage to get an order, then actually you have some grounds to hold SS accountable, if a judge rules that there is no issue and no threat, but SS have stopped contact, then you could then pursue a compliant against SS.
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GTTS

Will the court decide that she gets residence if I go for a CAO?