[Solved] social services ripped family apart. help please!

That could take a very very long time and meanwhile no contact is taking place. I have run out of advice to give you, basically you either need to make an application or accept there won't be any contact for a very long time and a complaint may or may not change that.

If CS won't recommend to your ex that your family should have contact then they can apply to court, grandparents often make their own applications. They would have to write to a District Judge at the court closest to the children and ask for permission to submit an application.

You don't know it will take a considerable amount of time at all. If they can take contact away so easily and quickly then they should be able to reinstate it. The reason why cs first came involved was when the police was called to an alleged affray where baby wasn't even present and gf was in bed. This has now been dropped. There is only the harrassment charge left to deal with and I'd be suprise if I get done for saying I miss my family it's ridiculous. Ex gf dad is friends with all the social workers down there and it is obvious he has something to do with this. Her sisters partner doesn't get to see his kids either. I will be filing a complaint and hopefully get support by the mp and maybe seek references from people that know Me such as colleagues teachers doctor friends etc. Everyone knows I love my little girl and everyone knows I took good care of her and pose no danger whatsoever. They might have won the battle buy let's see who wins the War when my daughter is older her relationship with that side of the family is going to be affected and that's not what I wanted at all.

I said it 'could' take a long time and complaints procedures are also not a quick process. Court isn't a quick route either, but at present, you have a choice to take that route if you wish.

If something changes in your situation and you would like specific support, please feel free to ask and we will endeavour to assist you. As stated in my previous post, at present, there is no further advice I am able to offer.

I hope it all works out for you.

Accept there won't be any contact for a very long time. Thanks for that. I can have contact today by turning up at her house. But that would be the wrong way just like taking it to court when it's cs not doing there job properly

We can all sense your annoyance at your situation, but it's hardly fair to have an attitude with us when all we have ever tried to do is advise and support you.

Have you thought about going through the appeals/complaints procedure and see if that will get them to change their recommendations, but again this will take time.

I really do hope that you can move it forward without court, but our advice remains the same....we don't feel that you will change the direction in the near future, CS rarely do a u turn and when they do it takes time. If they changed their mind outright it would be like saying they had been mistaken, which I can't see happening.

It's good that you have found the advice and support you wanted with FRG and as Yoda says, I hope it works out for you.

Im sorry about that it's just frustrating especially when I haven't done anything wrong except crash my car into a wall nearly 2 years ago well before my daughter was born. And then messaging her saying I miss my daughter etc having not seen her for 4 months. I appreciate the advice, and the complaints procedure is where I am at. But even if ththey don't accept they have made a mistake, what is the child protection plan for. I have done everything they have asked and iv gone from supervised contact which went well to no contact at all. I was under the impression if I adhered to the plan things would improve. So why when I have ticked all the boxes has things not changed. Arnt they supposed to or am I wrong about that I'm confused. Iv gone from 2 years ago smoking weed gambling crashing my car etc to working full time 6 days a week including community service not smoking weed for well over a year my daughters only six months old. Not gambling etc on top of all the courses and doctors etc to make sure I don't act stupid again when I wouldn't anyway because my priorities changed as soon as I found out I had a child on the way. I get my licence back may next year and been offered a promotion at work earning my months wage now each week. I'm focused on my goals even though I'm suffering every single day. It's ridiculous. I wouldn't mind if they intervened before I sorted my life out 2 years ago but they intervened at a time I was doing well and my priorities were my child her mum and providing for them. I couldn't have Been that bad she wanted to marry me before they intervened. Now from what I can gather she hates me which again is ridiculous I haven't done anything except miss my daughter. I might be missing out on my daughter I'd be lying if I didn't say I needed her I need her as much as she needs me but she's missing out too big time I did everything for her before and after she came, more than her mum did with no disrespect she's a great mum. My daughters now living in burnley with a family consisting of her mum which is good her mum's sister who text my gf saying she hopes she dies when they had an argument who also have social services involved with her kids who arnt allowed to see their dad either. Her dad lives in blackpool anyway and didn't even bother with her until she was 2 months old didn't even get in contact at the birth or all way through the pregnancy. And since iv found out the Last contact session was supervised by a social worker who is friends with her dad aswell as friends with many other social workers in burnley. It's not what you know it's who you know. Me my mum my grandma my sister my aunty have done a lot for them both and literally no one else helped whatsoever during the pregnancy or after. So there both missing out and her mum has been turned against me by her dad and sister. Do you know what I don't know a better dad than myself I actually don't iv made mistakes but never let my daughter down and I never will she's the world to me, and iv always said il stand by her mum even after her turning against me because she's still my daughters mum most people would hold a grudge iv not said a bad word to or about her. So yes I am frustrated.

Hello jkickerk,

I understand how frustrated, angry and upset you feel but what is stopping you from taking the matter to court (before a judge) to get contact with your daughter?

1. Because I don't think I should have to fight the mother of my daughter for access as it isn't her stopping me having contact, the ss are advising against it.
2. I don't think the ss are treating me fairly.
3. The family rights group are advising me against going court at the moment aswell as social services have a lot of input in to what comes out of it so I won't get the contact I deserve anyway.
4. It seems the ss want me to go the court way so an order is in place to watch their own backs. Then everytime I'm not happy with the level of contact or something else I have to go to court, putting even more stress on the relationship with her mother. I want us to be civil parents not against each other constantly. Also if I go for a CAO they will determine where my daughter lives etc so it won't be equal at all.

What do I have to do for ss to drop everything. I thought I had to do what's on the plan and that's it..

Please do not answer any of the following if you do not wish to as it is a public forum and anyone can read what you write :-

1) Why is SS advising the Mother against allowing contact, what are their reasons?

2) Why are the Family Rights Group advising against going to court?

3) What contact do you feel you deserve?

The reasons are in previous posts. They too feel I'm being treated unfairly and cs have a lot of impact on the courts decision. I deserve 50/50 contact. I'm as much as a parent to my daughter as her mum. Iv done everything for them both since day 1 of her being pregnant, the same time I started to get my act together.

I don't understand why SS are advising the Mother against allowing contact. If you know the reasons, you are better placed to challenge them.
I don't think I have read in previous posts any reasons why they (SS) have advised this but I may have misread the relevant part which gives this information.