[Solved] The mother in law

It's the thin end of the wedge. I hope your wife realizes what is going on, understands your feelings and that you both tackle this together.

I have had first hand experience of this where the father was totally undermined by the in-laws and eventually his partner. The end result was father was superfluous to requirements and the children viewed as possessions by the family with the Father pushed out completely. I'm not saying this is the same in your case but I believe you have valid cause to be wary..

Unfortunately I haven't time to write more but I sincerely hope you and your wife tackle this issue together. In fact it is a must that you do!

I agree - the ideal solution is that your wife supports you when this happens, hopefully without there being any falling out.

I think a lot of people have issues with the in-laws. Everyone is different and these differences can cause some friction in the relationship. As long as you and your wife are working together with the problem things should work out. I would talk with your mother-in-law and tell her it is not ok to talk to you like that. Letting her know she treats you disrespectfully may cause an argument, but you don't have to put up with her if you don't want to.

I had a very similar experience with my ex in laws.
They were both very controlling and unfortunately my ex wife allowed it to happen and in some respects was treated like a little girl. When my first child was born, they helped us out with child care so my wife could return to work on a part time basis to work a morning shift. We were very grateful as it allowed my wife to return to work and saved us a fortune on nursery fees. That is when their interference increased.
I felt pushed out. Everyday I would get in from work and they were there. I was made to feel like a stranger in my own home. Her father would make comments about jobs that needed doing around the house, not taking into consideration we had recently had our first child, money was tight and I was also working full time.
When my daughter starting to learn a few words, one of them was Dadda. I will never forget the day she was sat on the stairs and she called out Dadda and my father in law responded to her. I, quite ashamably, exploded. That was a line that he should never have crossed. We had a very heated discussion and I was made to feel worthless, surplus to requirements and generally useless. My wife never backed me up. We then went on to have another baby and the situation with my in law became so unbearable, I felt like leaving. I used to fill with dread every day when I was driving home from work - they were at the house every day. They completely took over. Arrangements were being made between them and my wife about the children - such as days out, trips to the theatre and so on. It also started to have an impact on my parents as they felt completely left out.
My father in law passed away 4 years ago very suddenly. I would never wish anyone dead but I can honestly say, I felt this huge weight lift from my shoulders. I was claiming my family back. I reinstated myself as daddy. My mother in law no longer had her front man and I was able to take control and she knew it.
I really hope that your wife is supporting you and recognising what is happening. Sadly, I never had the support from mine. The apron strings were still attached and when her dad spoke, she would sit up and listen. A very strange situation for a mature grown adult to be in.

Maybe sit down and talk to your wife - tell her how you are feeling. Telling someone how comments make you feel is a big statement. The last thing you want is for a major fall out with your in laws and your wife. You will be seen by them as the 'bad guy' so just try and keep your cool but you really need to share your feelings with your wife.

Hope you get it sorted