[Solved] court access tough case need help please

I appreciate why you have stopped the contact but it is important for your child to know that side of her family. How old is your daughter? I can see why it is important that she knows about her biological parent but this should be spoken about in an appropriate way and at an appropriate age.

Mediation is compulsory before making an application to the court for contact but I'm not certain if an exemption would be made as it's not between mother and father. Have you had any communication from the courts to confirm the application?

she is 4 years old and from day one she has been shown pictures of her biological mother with them saying this is your mummy, I always wanted her to know where she came from and still do but like you say I want to do it when she's old enough to understand better but I never got that option as her family just chose to do what they want without asking me like they do with everything else they don't see me as her father they like to be in control and its got to the point now where what her family are doing is causing problems at home with her behaviour, I have had the mediation option but didn't go as I don't get legal aid with the house hold income my daughter is a lot more settled since she stopped going to see them in more of a routine.

Children are easily confused and this won't be good for your daughter at such a young age. I do understand why her biological family would be keen to keep the memory of their daughter alive for themselves and their grand daughter but it needed handling with sensitivity and care. I don't have any experience of dealing with children's emotions regarding the loss of a parent at such a young age so probably can't be of much help here. Other members might have and hopefully they will offer advice.

With regard to the court application, Cafcass are likely to contact you to set up a telephone interview, I would stress that you refused Mediation purely due financial restrictions and explain you felt you had no other choice than to stop contact due to the effects on your daughter and reiterate this when you attend court.

Nobody knows or can predict the outcome of court proceedings but IMO it's likely that they would allow some sort of contact going forward.

Does your daughter attend school or nursery? If so, have they made any comment on her behaviour / whether things seem to have effected her and if she is more stable now? It might be worth asking them for a letter or report?

It would help to prepare yourself a Position Statement for the first hearing, it's not mandatory but will be helpful for the court to see this laid out and for yourself to use as a guide to make your points.

she has been to nursery and yes they did notice a difference in her behaviour a huge improvement and she has now started school the teachers are aware of the situation. I have always informed my health visitor of her behaviour and our HV had told us to stop access because as far as my daughter is concerned my partner is her mum she was 4 weeks old when her mother passed away, I always had a support worker who again told us to stop the access because of the effects of it on my daughter. if they did get the access what would happen if I still refused the access?

thank you for your advice I will get all the information that I need to help me in court when it gets there this has been going on since January this year the access got stopped in march this year

Any recommendations from school, HV etc are great to support your case.

If you are issued with an order for contact, if you break the order they can go back to court for enforcement. As most Dad's on here know, not a lot happens when an order is broken but the judge would generally slap you on the wrist and tell you to stick to the order. It can progress to fines, unpaid work, prison sentence or change of residency (but these are extreme cases).

It might be that if an order is granted, it could be indirect or supervised or have other such conditions attached.

I really don't know if this the case and it is just a suggestion, but if you like this suggestion I would seek legal advice on it. Could you find out if an order could stipulate that they are not allowed to discuss the biological mother during contact periods and if they did, they would be in breach of the order?

It might be that a court won't recommend contact, as I said, impossible to predict.

It might be worth ringing a solicitor, quite a lot do 30 minute free consultations, Coram Children Legal Centre's free helpline give excellent free legal advice or you could look on the Families Need Fathers website and see if they have a branch meeting in your area, they are run by McKenzie Friends and you can get advice / guidance and meet other parents going through the process?

Thank you I'm hoping they won't allow visitations but if they do I would like the indirect where it's letters and phone calls until my daughter is old enough to decide on her own if she wants to see them. There just not a nice family and what they are doing they think is normal as the grandma already has her other granddaughter she seems to think she can have my daughter and don't like the fact I have stood my ground and fought when social services have been out time after time.

1626 has given some good advice and having read your story and the fact that you have the support of your HV and support worker which should carry weight in court, I feel you have a good case.

How far along are they with trying to take you to court? Have you received a hearing date? As grandparents their rights are limited, yes they had access but that is not a right as they don't have Parental responsibility...even with PR they wouldn't have a right to contact!

The fact that your daughter is so young and her behaviour has improved since access has been stopped is also in your favour.

Good luck with it all, I hope the court make the right decision for your daughter.....

Nannyjane I haven't yet received anything for the court case just had letters from solicitors about mediation I am waiting for them to make the next move, just want to say thank you both for advice much appreciated, I just get anxious and like to know what's best to do for when it happens as I know court will be the next step for them, how long does it take for a case to get to court roughly?

Once the forms are submitted, the first hearing is usually listed for 6-8 weeks from receipt....

... You never know, they might not take it further...as I said, grandparents don't have rights as such and the court won't automatically grant them contact, it's certainly a gamble for them.

Generally you would receive the court papers about 7-10 days after they submit them, with the first hearing 4-8 weeks after that.

I'm going to research case law with Grandparents as the applicant party and see what I can find out for you, but in the meantime try not to worry.