Hi guys,
I’m new to all this so I don’t really know what to expect, I was seeing my ex for 2 years. We broke up a couple of months ago and recently she has told me she was pregnant.
I went to the first scan to see how far she was as we were going to terminate and we needed to see how far she was before we knew if it was going to be a pill or surgery to terminate.
we had the surgery booked for this following Monday for the termination, but last night she said she wants to push back the date, I asked to speak to her before she did but she said she didn’t want to speak about it and she has now pushed the date back a week without speaking to me about it.
I live in a house share, she has a mortgage but she is self employed. She even worked it out that if she had the baby she would have to sell her flat. She was 100% on the termination until her mother said maybe she should push the date because until she was certain. But she already was certain?
She has been smoking still every day, more than 10/15 a day. She has also been drinking even after she knew she was pregnant as she was certain she was getting the termination.
By the looks of it, it’s looking like she’s going to have the baby. But if that is the case what do I have to expect? I’d obviously want to be involved in my child’s life, but how can I do that in a house share. I earn 29k but can’t even afford to rent a normal flat due to the area I live is expensive.
Will the baby have problems due to the smoking and drinking, she will smoke until full term as she is a heavy smoker and has been for years.
Do I have any rights? Can I get housing? I’m so scared, I’ve finally just started a proper career. Do I have to pay CSA she earns double what earn.
I’m not scared about being a single dad, as I was raised by my father but times have changed, I can hardly afford my lifestyle and I don’t live beyond my needs.
Please advise on what I can do.
hi,
I think it's unlikely you will get council housing as a single person. I don't think you should worry about for now.
in future if she gets CMS involved, you would be expected to pay 12% of your gross weekly income, about £290 a month.
you can wait until child is born, then see if she will be amicable and sort child contact. can also try mediation, and court as last resort.
@bill337 hi bill, she won’t not let me see my child, we are still very amicable. She mentioned something that kinda scared me, she said she doesn’t even know if she would keep it after the birth. Would I have grounds to take full custody? I presume I would.
@jordm97 if you have any concerns about her mental health or worried about her behaviour, please seek advice from social services.