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I would like some advise please,i would like to take my 11 day old baby out for the day to see my family but i dont want the babys mum or aany of her family near me,they are all threatening and if i wanted to see my daughter i would have to meet her in town with HER new 27 yr old boyfreind.That was the first message i got from herand i dont want to do that she said "im in town with baby and my boyfreind if you want to see your baby".I have only seen her once and i dont want to do things on her terms,she has already posted pics of our baby on facebook asleep with her boyfreind with the title ASLEEP WITH DADDY,i cant go to there house ....im only 17, and none of my family have seen my daughter yet surely i have got some writes to have my own child without her and her big ugly boyfreind,any advise will be gratefull please im losing sleep over this and the trouble she has caused is not on.HELP
Hi "lost the plot Not"
Welcome to the forum, we all understand how you feel as there are many of us here going through similar circumstances. First thing I would suggest is to outline exactly what you want and be reasonable given the child's age. Approach her in the nicest of ways maybe in the form of a letter and ask pointing out that its in the child's best interest. See how things go for a while and if it is still problematic then you have the option of the courts. Given your age i'm assuming you are not working and probably still live at home. Your parents would be a great help and its best you involve them as much as you can if possible. However before courts you must try mediation, so get in contact with your local mediator and they will advise you further, with your age you may be exempt from paying but you will have to check with them. Also are you on the birth certificate? If not you will have to apply for this as well and I don't mean to sound rude but are you sure the child is yours? I would request a DNA to confirm, I hear of these situations way too often. You could be saving yourself a lot of heartache
Good luck
Hi there
As craig says, it's important as to whether you are on the birth certificate as this gives you Parental Responsibility.
I agree, a nice letter might be the first step and unless she is agreeable, mediation would be the way forward. Try National Family Mediation
www.nfm.org
Legal Aid is still available for Mediation and you can check your eligibility here
www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid
You would see the mediator alone at first, they would then invite your ex to do the same. If she agrees, you then go to sessions together. If she refuses, the mediator will stamp a C100 form for you to apply for a Child Arrangement Order, this costs 215 but you may be eligible for a reduction or exemption and this is form EX160a. If you are not on the birth certificate, you will also need to apply for Parental Responsibility and this is form
Try to avoid court if you can, it often makes things much more difficult.
In terms of your rights, parents don't really have that many rights, it's the child that has a right to a relationship with both parents. At 11 days old, your child is far too young for unsupervised contact as she is still very dependent on her mother. Perhaps you could suggest that you visit at her home for regular but short periods of time and then follow this with possibly taking a family member with you. You need to work on building trust with the mother and take it slowly.
It must be very hard for you right now and I wish you luck with it all.
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