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Too young to go sho...
 
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[Solved] Too young to go shopping with her friends?

 
(@batman)
Estimable Member Registered

Hi,

My daughter is twelve and reasonably independent, but about 4 friends of hers have suggested a bus trip into a nearby town (okay it's a city, but it is a small city) to do shopping for the day...

This seems too much of a leap - we do let her go shopping in closer small town with her friends.

My wife is sure this is a bad idea, but I'm more relaxed - on the other hand I'm not sure why 4 of her friend's parents think it is a good idea...

Any thoughts...?

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 26/11/2014 1:45 am
(@daver)
Noble Member Registered

I would be thinking that if it were my daughters I would want to drop them off and pick them up at least.

I would also be hanging around town until they had finished and meet up with them.

Give a bit of independance but be there and have telephone cntact, regular calls, whilst they were there.

I wouldnt let them all hop on a bus, just my thoughts.

Dave

ReplyQuote
Posted : 26/11/2014 1:50 pm
(@batman)
Estimable Member Registered

That's useful to know, just looking for other thoughts / opinions/ experiences in this area!

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 26/11/2014 2:47 pm
(@dadmod4)
Illustrious Member

I agree with DaveR - give them some independence but be close by. Perhaps you could suggest that you will treat them to lunch but they have to meet you somewhere for it, though you don't have to sit with them - that way it breaks up the day into two halves.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 26/11/2014 11:50 pm
batman and batman reacted
(@crocsarecrap)
Reputable Member Registered

I'd say 12 (y7) is a good age to allow a bit of independence. Does she have a mobile she can ring you on if she has any problems.
All depends on the area, the length of the bus journey and how confident she is in herself.

My 12 yr old does the 4 mile bus journey to town with his friends. My ex allowed our 10 yr old to do it with him at last contact, I was furious, 10 is far too young and I felt it placed too much responsibility on the 12 yr old.

A lot of 12yr olds in high school have to catch the bus to school now a days.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27/11/2014 12:57 am
(@batman)
Estimable Member Registered

I think the reason I / we considered saying yes was because she does the bus ride to school already. She is very independent, and we already had a plan to take her and some friends to the city we live nearby and let them "shop" for the day whilst we go somewhere else. We had another event on the same day so can't pull that one out of the hat.

She is more level headed than some of her friends, but them getting into an argument in town and splitting up is a reasonably high possibility.

Decided to tell her tonight, she didn't take it well... 🙁

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 27/11/2014 1:54 am
(@dadmod4)
Illustrious Member

Perhaps an alternative date as a definite might help her to calm down.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27/11/2014 2:42 am
(@batman)
Estimable Member Registered

Sadly that didn't help hugely, but she is a bit more relaxed about it today!!!

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 28/11/2014 2:36 am
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