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Hi everyone... I have some good news but also need some advice..
Since splitting with my ex we had shared custody of my son - 12 years old, which was agreed mutually rather than formally. We agreed that I would pay £250 a month.
Over time, demands for more and more money kept coming in to the point where I said no. On 22nd October 2017 she went to the csa but she lied about over night stays with me and told them I only had him two nights a week. This meant I was tasked to pay £437 a month.
I told the csa from day one that this was a lie but apparently the person claiming doesn’t have to swear on an oath to tell the truth??! I was told that I would need to prove shared care with a court order.
In January I basically told her that if she doesn’t tell the csa the truth I would go to a custody hearing which would inevitably end up with shared care being ruled because my son is very firm that everything should be ‘fair and equal’. She then luckily phoned the csa on 22nd January to tell them that care was shared. I had to carry on paying the full amount whilst it was reviewed.
Since then to now I had been waiting for the csa to review and decide on what they want to do payment wise. Today they have ruled shared care and shut the case with no money owed either way!! Which is amazing news as I know a lot of you face this battle with them.
However, they have told me to write off all the money I have paid since 22nd October 2017 ‘as one of life’s lessons’!! And to not rock the boat as I have a great outcome. Apparently they can’t recover the money back themselves?!I’m £2186 out of pocket. If she had phoned up on day 1 and said shared care they would have told her to p*** off, so now she will have got away with lying to a government body (she is a police officer) she is also quids in and has just booked a holiday to Miami whereas I can’t even afford a holiday with my boy now!
Am I being unreasonable to expect the money back or are the csa right that I should leave it? I can’t help but wonder if they are saying it because it’s more work for them if I Persue it? Has anyone had any experience in claiming money back from the claiming party?
Sorry for the essay and thank you in advance for taking the time to read/reply
The CSA are not able to recover the money for you, as their calculations were correct on the basis of the information they were supplied with at the time by your ex (in the event of a dispute in overnight stays, their default position is 1 night per week) with no evidence to the contrary. She is required to given them the correct information, but I have never heard of an example of the PWC being fined for not providing this. In my opinion, your only option would be to pursue your ex through the small claims court, but I don't think they would particularly want to rule in a family court matter like this, and you would have to prove that your ex was deliberately deceiving the CMS through this time, whereas she could say that circumstances changed and that shared care was a recent event. In all honesty, I think your chances of getting the money back are remote, and it will probably cause you a lot of anguish in trying to do so. Much as it is very annoying, I would be inclined to write the money off as a lost cause, and at least you don't have to pay maintenance in future.
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