[Solved] Scared and Struggling

As a rule of thumb it's 16% of your wages. And here's the kicker csa work it out before deductions (tax NI pension ECT)

So it's a start that when you get paid just work out the 16%.

It's what I have been doing as I was advised it was the best way. If it goes through csa or cms. They will do it automatically before you even see your money. But they also charge a fee. So in a mutual agreement we have set it at 16% plus I pay towards other things.

But I don't know the relationship between you and your ex if it's amicable then you can come to the agreement without needing an outside source then it's better.

But this money goes towards them when they are not with you. You will have to sort it out for yourself when they are with you.

The csa calculation works on this figure but also takes into account howw long and when they stay with you. You will have to speak to your ex and see if she can agree on it.

Thank you Rich,,

Thanks for taking time to offer some info, that's made me perk up a bit just with that little bit of info... yeah Its amicable to a degree am sure we will find find a way that will be best for the kids and an I'm looking to get an agreement be put in place so be both know whats what. I take on what you said and thanks again.

Oh and always pay through your bank. Resist cash. It's easy to say it never happens without paper proof. Just the way I do it as I'm paranoid she will say I didn't give them a penny. I'm still sorting all this out with my ex so it's still a long road.

For the agreement you could get the csa to write one up. If you contact them first it will work for you. Don't let it get to the stage where your ex will do it. They have the means to make it all above board and properly done.

You are lucky that it's amicable. Mine however is just starting to turn nasty. And I'm going to struggle.

But as I'm sure everyone will say always make time for the kids and never let anything thhaat happens with your ex make its way to them. They need parents not arguments.

Hi,

I agree with you that it is daunting, when I first split up with my ex I wondered how I would be able to afford the basics! But after 6 years separated and moving back to my parents house, I now own a house with a new partner who is great.

In terms of finance, you have come to the right place to ask questions... The rules are very confusing, but once you get your head round them, it always good to know so you are prepared for what is coming.

Now before we start it is always better to not get the CMS involved, they are extremely difficult to deal with. I would recommend the following:

- Sign yourself up for a governement gateway tax account so you can see you annual earnings that the HMRC see.
- Once setup, get your annual earnings figure for 2018/2019 (year that ends March 2019)
- Make sure you take the figure before any tax or NI has been taken off
- This is your golden figure that you need to work from.
- Work out 19% of this figure and divide by 12. This is worst case what you are legally required to pay your ex per month.
- There will be discounts for the amount of nights stayed etc.
One complication to this. CMS use a 25% rule, payments will only change if your current income (previous 12 weeks) is higher or lower by 25% or more.

I would use the CMS calculator, at the below link. you will need your weekly figure to do this. (Easily worked out by dividing your annual figure by 52). On here you can put overnights etc.

PENSION CONTRIBUTIONS ARE TAKEN OUT OF YOUR EARNINGS. THEY ARE NOT INCLUDED IN THE CALCULATION THAT THE CMS USE.

https://www.gov.uk/calculate-child-maintenance

PM me if you want any more information.