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Bit of an odd one (well it is for me at least!).
I have an estranged son, who is now 19, and has just finished full time education.
For various reasons, we don't have contact anymore, although his mother (my ex-partner) still reaches out and keeps in touch from time to time (especially if she wants more money).
I've been paying child support without fail since the separation. It's paid directly from my bank account into hers each month (it used to be handled by the CSA until 5 or 6 years ago when they changed everything).
Anyway, a few days ago, one of my son's godparents contacted me and mentioned casually that my son actually moved out of his mother's house when he was 16 and has been living with his grandmother since then. This was complete news to me as his mother had never mentioned it whenever I asked how he was getting on.
This has got me thinking - if, for the past 3 years he has not been living there, shouldn't his mother have disclosed this to me so that I could ensure the money was paid directly to him (or his grandmother) instead?
Without wishing to badmouth her too much, she is exactly the sort of person who would say nothing and sit back, letting me fund her lifestyle with the money that was supposed to go to supporting our son.
My maintenance payments come to an end as of this month, and obviously this doesn't make any difference to me financially, but I am concerned that the money hasn't been going towards its intended purpose.
In my opinion, if he's hasn't been living with his mother, she shouldn't be receiving the money at all - and instead it should be going either to my son directly, or to his grandmother.
Before I contact the CSA to discuss it, I wanted to see if anyone had been through a similar thing, and might know where (if anywhere) I might stand on getting the money recouped and forwarded onto my son instead?
Hi,
I have not experienced this, but so recommend you join this support group for paying parents. Lot of experienced members:
https://facebook.com/groups/239699060076601/
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