[Solved] paying for my son

Go to the CSA let them work it out for you. That way she can never hold it against you or say you should pay more. As for the land for sale think it's best to speak to a law firm.

Definitely go through the CSA - what you are saying she wants could land you with big problems, from the way I read it.

If I have it right, she is saying that you can buy out your share of the land at the rate of £177 per month (which is what you will pay in maintenance calculation) - you could find that she has applied to the CSA and that any money you pay as maintenance in the meantime will be completely disregarded as being maintenance, so you'll owe arrears. As suggested, see a lawyer (or citizens advice bureau) about the sale of your share of the land.

sorry i think u miss read it she wants to buy my share with the money she will get from csa what should be for my son and she claiming benefits and making money on the side i dont think she gone to the csa yet ? it looks like blackmail so she can get her hands on the land

Hi rchawkins1964@gmail.com

Thank you for your post, I am William the Child Maintenance Options consultant. Many parents choose to sort out child maintenance between themselves. It can be the quickest and easiest way of arranging child maintenance, and we call it a family-based arrangement. These arrangements are made without involving the Child Maintenance Service or needing to disclose personal information to a third party.

You and your son’s mother would need to agree together who will provide what for son. There are no strict rules or formulas that you have to stick to when agreeing a payment amount. It can include money and other kinds of support, for example helping with nursery payments, school uniforms or school trips. Collaborating together to make and keep a family-based arrangement is better for your children.

Family-based arrangements are not legally binding. However, they give you the flexibility to change your arrangement as your son gets older and his needs change, or if either you or your son’s mother has a change in circumstances.

To help you and your son’s mother put a family-based arrangement in place we have some tools and guides available to download from our website at http://www.cmoptions.org/en/toolbox/index.asp. You may find our Child Maintenance Decisions guide for paying parents Information for parents living apart from their child and a Discussions Guide. These can help you understand your child maintenance choices and help you plan your conversation with your son’s mother. We also have a family-based arrangement form. You can complete this with your son’s mother and sign your names to show your commitment to your arrangement. Although this is not a legally enforceable document, it puts the agreement on a more formal basis.

If you would like an indication of how much maintenance may be payable, based on how the Child Maintenance Service calculates maintenance. There is a calculator available on our website at http://www.cmoptions.org/en/calculator/. Some parents use the figure provided as a starting point to negotiate a family-based arrangement.

If you feel you a family-based arrangement will not work for you, you still have the option of using the statutory service, through the Child Maintenance Service.

The Child Maintenance Service have two schemes Direct Pay and Collect and Pay. Direct Pay is when the Child Maintenance Service calculates maintenance and then leave you and your son’s mother to decide together how your payments will be made. The Child Maintenance Service will not contact you again unless either of you report a change in circumstances or if they are told that you have missed or fallen behind with your payments.

Collect and Pay is when the Child Maintenance Service calculate, collect and enforce payments on your behalf, as some parents prefer the security and help of a third party managing their child maintenance. If an application is made with the Child Maintenance Service, your responsibility to pay will start from around the time that the Child Maintenance Service contacts you. If you would like more information about the Child Maintenance Service and how they calculate child maintenance, you can find this on their website at www.gov.uk/child-maintenance.

The Government plans to introduce charges for using the Child Maintenance Service in spring 2014. There will be three types of charges:

- Application fees
- Fees for collecting and paying out child maintenance
- Enforcement charges for paying parents who do not pay

The exact amount for these charges are still to be approved by parliament, however, the Child maintenance Service will write to you at least a month before they are introduced.

The best way to avoid charges is to set up a family-based arrangement and not use the Child Maintenance Service at all.

However, if you and the other parent cannot agree an arrangement between yourselves, there will be no collection fees for parents who pay and receive child maintenance using Direct Pay, only application fees. For parents using the Collect and Pay scheme the government plans to charge collection fees to both the paying and receiving parent, this is for collecting and passing on child maintenance payments.

Under the government’s plans the paying parent would have to pay 20% in addition to the weekly maintenance payment and the receiving parent would have 4% taken away from the weekly maintenance payment. For further information you may wish to speak to the Child Maintenance Service directly.

If you would like to make an application to the Child Maintenance Service you would need a URI number, which you can receive by speaking to Child Maintenance Options. It is unique to you and shows that you have spoken to Child Maintenance Options before applying for a statutory child maintenance arrangement. You will be asked to give this number when you apply to the Child Maintenance Service and you will not be able to apply without it. If you lose it you will need to speak to us again before you can apply. So please keep it safe and do not disclose it to anyone else.

If you feel that none of the above options will work for you, you could consider a Consent Order/Minute of Agreement, which is an official ruling made by a court. To arrange a Consent Order, both parents need to agree how much child maintenance will be paid and how often, before going to court. Parents can agree this either privately between themselves, through a solicitor or a mediator. Once an agreement has been made, parents can then ask the court to approve and authorise the Consent Order. This usually happens when parents are going to court for other reasons, such as arranging a divorce or dividing their property or other assets.

We have a sorting out separation web-app that you may find useful. It offers help and support to separating and separated families. The link is: www.dad.info/divorce-and-separation/sorting-out-separation.

Thanks

William

sorry i think u miss read it she wants to buy my share with the money she will get from csa what should be for my son and she claiming benefits and making money on the side i dont think she gone to the csa yet ? it looks like blackmail so she can get her hands on the land

I think I understood correctly, but mistyped my response.

Basically, as long as what you pay to her is accepted by the CSA as maintenance, then you aren't liable for any further maintenance each month. What she does with that money is, unfortunately, entirely up to her. If she wants to give you that money back each month until she has bought your share out, then that's up to you to agree with her, but you don't have to accept it - but if you want to sell your share, then if you can agree a price, selling to her achieves that objective - but the money must be paid the her, and then back to you, otherwise the CSA will back any claim she makes that you haven't paid maintenance.