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So my ex is constantly messaging me with nasty messages ect hounding me for maintanence (which I pay but only just stopped as I recently don't have a job) so she will be getting as soon as I have a job again, but is there any way of getting her to stop messaging me all together unless it's to do with my child? And not stupud things that if it bothered her so much she could just phone CSA or someone to get in contact with me? I really do not get on with her and wish I could cut contact with her unless to do with my chil e.g picking her up ect.. hoping someone has any ideas? Hopefully not to go through court
Hi there
It's a difficult one, especially as you want to avoid escalating the bad feeling by going to court, or making things worse for your child by getting an injunction out on her for harassment.
You have a couple of options, you could try mediation to try and reach agreement and have it written into a Memorandum of Understanding, although this isn't legally binding.
You could consider buying a cheap pay as you go phone and giving her that number to contact you on, that way you can put the phone away or turn it off until you are ready to look at it, thus giving you back some control of the situation. If you decide on a time to check the phone, once that's done, you can put it aside and get on with your day! Your. Main phone won't be a source of anxiety for you anymore and hopefully you will get some peace from her constant nasty messages.
All the best
I know how you feel Roads, sometimes I really wish I didn't have to talk to the ex, and I'm sure she feels the same way. Reality is, we have to take responsibility for our decision of having had a child together. No one forced us to. And when there is a child involved, we have to take a minute to consider how the child feels being in the middle of a never ending argument.
I think Mojo gave you excellent advise. I would also add, if your ex is being abusive, she is probably anxious, fearful, maybe depressed.
Take the higher ground. Learn to ignore, and keep it civil from your side for your child's sake.
Yes it's hard to do, but it's even harder for your child, and she has no responsability in creating the situation, only you and the ex do.
Hope it works out well and good luck in the job hunt.
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