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Hi guys so i was awarded a court order to have my two daughters every other weekend. I had been seeing them in a contact center and now was to build up out in piblic by an hour a week.
This by last christmas was die to be the weekend they stayed over. My fanily who loved them dearly has not seen them in over 2.5 years.
Since that weekend i was supposed to have them stay ive never got them off her doorstep.
They are 4 and 2. The ikdest says she does not want to come because i stole all her money. Her mum tells me this is from a film.
Every other weekend i sit on her doorstep outside for over two hours. They youngest wants to come but mum says if both dont go none do. They havr totally changed with me and ine week she olays with me next does not say a word to me. When im on the doorstep they spend more time with mum in the front room as she puts on kids films while im there. I was supposed to have them also on a tuesday for two hours after dance. Mym has demanded that unluss i pick them up after class and have them back in 15 mins ( its a half hour drive away) then its a no. I cannot do that so she says im breaking the order. I have a young son with my lovely partner now. They have never met each other and im lost as to what to do. I fought for so long in courts done everything asked of me and have never over a year later had them on ny own. She said she wanted to make a parent plan which i agreed a caffcass one. When i emailed her the guide which explains the importance of both familieies involvement ect. She point blank replies she does not feel comfortable talking about it. Im lost as to what to do next . Is she breaching the order by giving a 4 year old and two year old the option to come? Please help!! Thank you ever so much. Great forum which helped me fight this court in first place bu myself . I fought after that day it was the start of great things but instead went total opposite.
Hi there
Quite simply she isn't complying with the court order, she should be encouraging the children's relationship with you, not putting films on for them when you're on the doorstep!
She is breaching the order and it would be appropriate to apply to the court for an enforcement order. It's not up to such young children to be the decision makers about contact, it's inappropriate to put such responsibility on such little shoulders.
I would suggest that you write to her formally, pointing out that she is in breach of the order, that you have been patient but see no improvement in the situation and if there's no change you will have no option but to make a court application for enforcement of the order.
Explain that you would far rather that she works with you and encourages the children's contact with you, perhaps suggest that it might be easier if handovers took place away from their home, for example in a nearby supermarket car park. You could comment that putting films on for them, when you're waiting outside for them, isn't conducive to contact taking place and ask that she has the children ready to leave when you arrive and encourages them, perhaps by walking them to the car and being positive about their visit.
I would also say that you were disappointed that she refused to work with you on the CAFCASS parenting plan, suggesting that this may be a way to resolve the situation, asking her to reconsider.
If you feel minded to, you could suggest mediation to try and sort it out.
All the best
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