[Solved] New to this CSA payment

Hi there (and welcome)

I think you have recieved the rough end of the stick with this.

As I see it you didn't want the break up and didn't want to seperate but it has all just happened around you.

You are not alone in your break down and many of us have been through the same, its good you can admit and and you aren't worried about hiding it as its nothing to be ashamed of, the more you talk about it the easier it will be to cope with.

with regards to the CSA, have you calculated the amount yourself using the on line calculator?

if it turns out different to what she has said then why not contact CSA yourself and go officialy through them as them.

I would also be very weary of the fact that at the moment it doesn't look as though you are actually paying her if you were to look on paper, you have no record of any payments being made as she is removing the payments from what she pays you.

I don't know the answer as to how to get around this if i'm honest as if she doesn't pay you half the mortgage and keeps the money you can't show you have paid her, maybe though she will either give you or sign a reciept to say it has been paid.

It would be very easy for her to claim you hadn't paid and claim she had actually under paid the mortgage.

GTTS

Hi GTTS......thanks for your kind message, I'm a different person to one I used to be 18 months ago, everything I thought was important in life was meaningless and superficial, some one said it's not what you have in your life, it's who you have in your life and my son means the world to me. I have used the CSA calculator and she is asking £50.00 a month more than I calculated. Good point about the payments vs. mortgage I never thought about that. ]Anyone else with any views on this? What I'm looking for clarification on and this is a legal question and I cannot take her on at the moment in a legal battle as I do not have the funds available as I said I'm just keeping my head above water now, but when the house is sold I will have some equity to use on gaining access to my son on a regular basis and spend quality time with him and investigating her CSA claim, sorry, my question was posed to me by a lady at my son's school she said in her first marriage as her earnings and potential future earnings were deemed to be greater than her ex husband that he was granted an order to pay a hugely reduced sum for maintenance is was approx. £20.00 per week, this lady is a barrister though and no I have not asked her for free legal advice. So guys if you have any more thoughts, advice or suggestions they will be gratefully received. Cheers N2W2

hi there

As far as I am aware it would be very unusual for that type of agreement to be placed by CSA

however it may be possible for a judge to rule this within the divorce settlement, though that said I wouldn't pursue it myself as if you decided to take the divorce to court for a final settlement you would be likely to loose every penney of equity you have gained from the house in legal fees.

I would look at what you have to loose against the small possible gain and weigh it up, think about time and energy as well as finances, a long 2-3 year battle would not only ruin your life but that of your sons and probably any chance of being amicable with your ex in the future.

I know this sounds mad and that if you are entitled then why shouldn't you fight for it but the simple answer is pick your battles, if your ex earns much more than you and has a lot more disposable income she will have more to spend on legal fees and won't be aw worried about dragging it all out.

If what you have found on the CSA calculator is £50 a month different why don't you contact them and get them to wright to her taking over the case, only down side to this would be getting the full (1/2) of the mortgage from her, but as said she may be willing to sign a reciept to say the CSA has been paid.

I would also suggest that before you soend any money on solicitors to see your son you try mediation as this may be the cheaper option, it would also allow you to see how the ground lies with your ex and how amicable she is looking to be, mediation is anywhere from £60-£150 an hour in my area but varies.

If you aren't able to agree in mediation then court is an option, this needn't be overly expensive either as you can represent yourself in the family courts and it is actually recomended by some solicitors as the judge gets to see and gauge your emotions.

Good luck and keep us posted, we have a legal team on board who can comment (on family law) so when you get to the point of pushing for that as long as you don't have a solicitor we can ask them to comment, unfortunately they can't comment on divorce or finances so that's just down to peoples experience of going through it themselfves.

GTTS

Hi GTTS.......good sound advice thank you. I have been thinking along the same lines as you but I'm more emotionally attached to this, so I need another perspective at times. I have decided to put in writing the counter claim to her about the £50.00 difference in the CSA calculations and wait.

It has been suggested to me before about mediation, but she will not go anywhere she may be put in a position of questions she does not want to answer, in the early days I suggested relationship counselling, she did not agree and in the end I went on my own and they offered to write to her and invite her along, she sent me an email saying she would not be going, the letter was in the bin and not to write to her in the future.

As recently as February I asked her to go to mediation for access and financial support for our son and again she declined and to summarise only 3 weeks ago when I was getting annoyed with the situation I went to see her parents who understood my predicament but refused to do anything, I replied you give me no choice but to further investigate my rights in law to which she sent me an email requesting I do not discuss any business surrounding our son with her parents, friends and family.

Strangely enough I get on very well with her sister and husband and last Friday went to dinner with them, her sister is very level headed and has a lot of common sense (which is sadly lacking in these sort of situations) and her take on the whole mediation/legal/court situation is, my ex has never given a reason or explanations to her leaving although there was plenty of evidence of an affair and she has never said anything to her family she responds to them with it's my business and it's in the past, therefore she does not want to get herself into a position where she feels she has the slightest chance of being questioned by anyone.

So thanks for listening and responding, if anyone else has any suggestions or advice let me know and thank you for the offer of ongoing support.

Cheers N2W2

Hello No2Words2

Thank you for your post. I am William, the Child Maintenance Options consultant. I understand that you have verbally agreed with your ex-partner that she will pay half of the mortgage until your house is sold. You mentioned that she has requested child maintenance from you and this will be deducted from her share of the mortgage.

Many parents choose to sort out child maintenance between themselves as you have already done. It can be the quickest and easiest way of arranging child maintenance and we call it a family-based arrangement. This type of arrangement can be made between you and your ex-partner or with the help of a friend, family member or professional mediator. A family-based arrangement is not legally enforceable but it is flexible so both of you can agree how much maintenance will be paid and whether you choose to record this. It can also include other kinds of support such as mortgage payments or clothing for your son. If you or your ex-partner has a change in your circumstances, such as the sale of your property, your family-based arrangement could be renegotiated.
To help you to maintain your family-based arrangement, we have got a child maintenance calculator and a number of guides that you may find useful. We have a family-based arrangement form that is not a legally enforceable document but may put your agreement on a more formal basis. You can complete this together with your ex-partner and sign your names to show your commitment to your arrangement. We also have a discussion guide available to download from our website which can help you to plan your discussion with your ex-partner.

You may find our Child Maintenance Decisions guide for paying parents: Information for parents living apart from their child helpful. It provides information on setting an arrangement up between you and the other parent and the other types of maintenance arrangements. If you feel any of our guides will help you, they are easy to print from our website at http://www.cmoptions.org.

If a family-based arrangement does not work for you, you still have other options. The Child Support Agency (CSA) has two schemes available, one is called Direct Pay and the other is called Collect and Pay. Direct Pay is where the CSA calculates child maintenance and then lets you and your ex-partner decide how payments will be made. Once they have calculated the maintenance amount, the CSA will not contact you or your ex-partner again unless your circumstances change or if they are told that payments have been missed.

The Collect and Pay service is where the CSA calculates, collects and enforces payments on behalf of the applicant, as some people prefer the security and help of third party involvement. If you decide to use the CSA, your responsibility to pay child maintenance will start from around the time you contact the CSA as you are the paying parent.

If you have got any questions about the CSA, or if you would like to set up maintenance using their service, you can contact them directly. You can find their contact details and information about how they work out child maintenance online at https://www.gov.uk/childmaintenance. An application does not need to be made by your ex-partner, you can also apply to the CSA to pay child maintenance.

If you feel that none of these options are suitable for you then you may wish to consider a Consent Order, which is an official ruling made by a court. To arrange a Consent Order, both parents need to agree how much child maintenance will be paid and how often before going to court and there may be legal costs associated with this.

You mentioned that a lady at your son's school told you that her ex-husband was granted an order to pay a reduced amount of maintenance as her earnings were greater than his. You would like to know whether this is correct. The CSA works out child maintenance payments using a set formula, which is based on the income of the paying parent. Other factors are taken into account including the number of children that need child maintenance, and if the paying parent lives with any other children. To find out if the courts can grant this kind of order you may wish to seek legal advice. As you said that you do not have the funds at the moment to pay legal costs you may wish to contact the Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB) as they provide free information and advice on topics such as legal, housing and debt. You can find your local CAB in the phone book or on their website at http://www.adviceguide.org.uk.

In your post you said that you are having issues regarding contact with your son and you have already tried to arrange mediation for this but your ex-partner has refused. Child maintenance and contact are not linked in law. If you have got any questions or concerns over contact you may wish to get in touch with National Family Mediation or Centre for Separated Families who are experts in this area. You can find their contact details below:

National Family Mediation
Telephone: 0300 4000 636
Opening: Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm
Website: http://www.nfm.org.uk

Centre for Separated Families
Website: http://www.separatedfamilies.info

If you are worried about your current financial situation, there is a Government website which provides details about benefits and work entitlements. You can find this information at https://www.gov.uk.

We have a sorting out separation web-app that you may find useful, it offers help and support to separated families. You can find this at: http://www.cmoptions.org/en/sortingoutseparation/index.asp.

If you would like to talk to our team in complete confidence about child maintenance you could give us a ring on 0800 988 0988. We also have some other useful tools on our website to help support parents experiencing separation.