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Hey all fellow fathers, this might be a bit long winded but I want to see where I stand.
ok so it starts back in 2012 I had a daughter with a previous she accused me of all sorts of horrible stuff and I had to fight my case within courts,cafcass and people that didn’t know me spent thousands to see my daughter which had to be arranged by supervised contact the mother decided, I had tried everything in my power to be a father and yet because the mum had legal aid had the power to always win,I had met my wife at this time and she was pregnant with my first son she even proved to courts I wasn’t who I was precieved by the ex and we arranged a 400 mile trip to see my daughter but on many occasions didn’t turn up, fast forward to 2022 where I now live in a family home with 5 children 3 my own and 2 step children receiving a marstons order demanding £4500 of me for failure of child maintenance and yet during all this time suffered from ptsd from not building a bond with my daughter to not finding work suited as I never trusted anyone but my wife, I am receiving UC and the useless CSA have finally acknowledged this have sent a bailiff to my door, I’m not a dad that won’t pay I’m a dad that can’t afford too I’m looking after 2 children that there dad can somehow gets away without paying a penny and yet I’m penalised for providing a home for them and mine, I’m sick of it I’m at suicidal point because I’ve done everything and yet every mother thinks I’m a waste of space and yet I have done set in motion that everything I own is always protected by the law that should protect us and yet is failing us parenting parents, I have social involved with my children because of my alcohol misuse which comes from all this and yet agency don’t get it, if I kill myself for example my wife kids get my house without the worry of a mistake I once make and yet haunt me for years to come
hi,
sorry to hear your having such a tough time. have CMS tried removing money from your bank accounts? I would recommend you join this facebook group, CMS support for non-resident parents. they have members that have experience of dealing with bailiffs sent by CMS. sure they can offer you great advice: https://www.facebook.com/groups/239699060076601
one member replied:
Too much info above and not enough facts about your CSA/CMS case. Are the arrears Real or Fictitious? Your say that you are on UC, have CMS actually done a 7 per week assessment? Marstons have been out, this means that a Liability Order was made by a Court. Were you notified of the hearing? Did you attend? Demand a full audit of your account from CMS, ALL transactions, full details of ALL assessment calculations, and proof of the alleged arrears. And, when dealing with CSA/CMS it is essential that you have a spreadsheet of their assessments and ALL payments made whether to her or to CSA/CMS and a file with the proof in ie copy bank statements and payslips etc. Include a balance column and you know exactly where you are. Have a read of my posts 'Fictitious Arrears' and 'Important - CSA Arrears'. Regarding Marstons, keep doors and windows locked and put your car somewhere safe. They will try visiting 2 or 3 times and then will return the matter to CMS
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