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next july she will probably lie and cms will be silly enough to believe her.
maybe you can have a free consultation with a solicitor and ask about them writing up a letter or a consent order about this. with me, everything was done together more or less. made c100 court application to get order first. then registered with CMS. sent them order as proof.
This mirrors my own situation. I have 52 plus nights over year, Covid stopped that, ex went to CMS and said whatever she said(they dont tell me). The result was no overnight shared care allowance and another £100 per month CM.
I too thought that the default was 1 night per week in a dispute situation, but I have since been told that only applies if you say you are having them 2+ nights per week and if the ex disputes this they default to 1 night. So in my case they revert to zero nights because that is what the ex told them!
I have appealed, they asked for evidence, I dont have a court order, but never needed one as there was no issue me having the children. I do not want to go to court just to prove I am having 52 nights and to save CM, I think the judge would view this badly.
So, yes she can lie, they believe her, I have nothing to counter it, other than their own website said they would not listen to such issues during covid. So I cannot understand why they made the change, during covid and without asking me first.
I expect my appeal to be rejected.......if you then get to next year and go to CMS to say you are having more, ex can dispute it and once again they will not listen to you.
HRabbit Sorry to hear you are going through similar...it’s a really unfair system. You’re encouraged to have a friendly arrangement, not to go to court and work things out yourselves... then something sours you have literally no legal proof to back you up!
We tried mandatory reconsideration but of course she lied.
We are going to report the shared care as a change in circumstances every month from now on. I assume they will have to ask her to confirm, at which point she will be lying to them on a regular basis. In the mean time we will likely get in touch with a solicitor and try and get something in writing. My only concern is that because the CMS case has been opened first that it won’t make any difference.
It makes me so angry, my husband is a good dad and has never let anything come in the way of having his kids regularly and without fail. He has always paid the right amount, if not more, on time every time. Yet still she is finding ways to avoid the full truth to bleed him as dry as possible.
I just want to enjoy why’s left of my pregnancy, bring our new baby into the world without having to deal with her lies and deceit and without worrying how we can afford to keep this up!
Although from what you just said, maybe we are better off telling CMS that we are now having them 2 nights, perhaps they might then assume 1!!!
Yes I would agree with that. It may be as simple as triggering the CMS mechanism to default a dispute over 104 days back to 52. Worth a try I think.......
It’s very tempting! But it’s just not the right thing to do is it, sadly.
We would then be lying too and that doesn’t sit well at all.
Agreed, but it could end up with the result that is truthful!
I am not condoning it and have not done myself, so that sort of answers you 🙂
Hi
Potentially speaking to your MP may be the only option here. The forum and press has examples of success via that route. Especially if the ex is making false declarations under a legal obligation to notify the CMS accordingly.
I've always wondered whether it is possible to report people to the police for fraud by making a false declaration in order to make a financial gain? (I'm sure this is a crime in other aspects eg benefits claims etc)..Or write to ex suggesting that this route may be considered? Clearly only where custody is secured by a water tight court order..
Thanks.
something similar here https://www.dad.info/forum/child-maintenance/48374-ex-wife-lying-about-overnights
Hi
I've always wondered whether it is possible to report people to the police for fraud by making a false declaration in order to make a financial gain? (I'm sure this is a crime in other aspects eg benefits claims etc)..Or write to ex suggesting that this route may be considered? Clearly only where custody is secured by a water tight court order..
Thanks.
That is an interesting point - in criminal law, the CPS have two tests to decide whether to take a prosecution forwards:
1. is there a reasonable chance of a conviction
2. is it in the public interest
Clearly, it must be in the public interest that maintenance is paid according to the rules, so as long as there is evidence to back up point 1, in theory the CPS should be prepared to prosecute. Would only take a couple of well publicised cases of this to make the resident parents realise there are consequences in lying.
Very true. I also guess it is about having the confidence, already holding the moral high ground in that one is right about their position and that the resident parent genuinely is lying. Plus willing to pursue this avenue via the police and have the strength to do so.
I wonder what the police would say if contacted with a report that a resident parent is committing fraud by false representation. eg I guess usually in cases where they deny that the children are having over night stays with the non resident parent? Would police say it is a matter for CMS or investigate it as clearly there is a financial gain.
I would imagine that it would be difficult to demonstrate there is a public interest in prosecuting these but if the matter was investigated and found to have a reasonable chance of prosecution but against the public interest whether CMS would then believe the non resident parent and adjust the CMS payment accordingly? What if the paying payment has never missed payments, always notified CMS of changes etc and the resident parent is blatantly lying, maybe there could be a public interest here?
It's interesting!