Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi all,
Met my ex in Britain, when she fell pregnant she left to go home to Ireland and never came back. When my child was born I paid her maintenance that we had agreed between ourselves. Inevitably the relationship eventually fell apart, things got very nasty and I stopped paying maintenance and going to Ireland for these reasons (in hindsight maybe not the right thing to do).
I was taken to my local family law courts and ordered to pay maintenance to her, which they calculated should be £430. But at the time I wasn't travelling to Ireland to see my child so no travel expenses were taken into consideration. Since then the situation has improved slightly although I struggle to see my daughter as much as id like to, currently making the journey every other month or 3 months. Ive raised this issue with the courts and all they do is send me the same forms time and time again, where I have to declare every single penny I earn and what its spent on. Id really like to avoid dealing with them ever again if I can avoid it.
What other options are available to me? Would the court order be able to be cancelled on the understanding me and the ex came to our own agreement?
Ive heard a court order is only enforceable for 1 year? If this is right what happens after the one year period is up?
Any help is much appreciated.
Hi there
Here in the uk, once court ordered maintenance has been in place for more than 12 months, it is possible to open a claim with the CMS which would override the court order.
However, as this a cross border situation I'm not sure how that would work. It might be worth having a chat with the CMS and getting some advice about where you stand from them.
Best of luck
In case you're wondering, I've deleted your duplicate post in the other section, just to avoid confusion if anyone started responding to both.
I do think you have had good advice. It's worth exploring this by speaking with someone from CMS.
Generally, the government prefers parties enter their own family agreement. You ex-partner has to agree to that though. There is nothing stopping her applying through CMS (or Ireland's equivalent) if the agreement is not being complied with or you have a disagreement.
All the best.
Thanks for the advice. I have been told by the family courts many times that the CMS cannot get involved in it, so maybe its best to speak to the CMS directly?
Generally, the court order ceases to have effect after 1 year in force. An application can then be made to the CMS. If you have just one child then you pay 19 per cent of your gross income unless you have a relevant child living with you in which case you pay 16.4 per cent of your gross income.
Best wishes.
After reading that it sounds like i may not have such a bad deal financially after all, just unfortunate i have to travel so far to have any sort of a bond with my child.
My basic salary is 30k, but in my job that can vary massively as im currently making closer to 65k. Using the calculation youve given me they would take alot more than the £430 that im currently paying.
I have no problem with supporting my child but i believe the costs should be equal 50/50. Do children cost £860 a month to look after? I cant see it myself. My problem starts when im supplementing my ex, not my child. The whole system is a complete mess, biased towards the mother in every circumstance, no one knows what is going on, getting a straight answer out of anyone about anything is near impossible. Anyway, rant over!
Thanks very much for your help, much appreciated. More useful info off you guys in 24hrs than in 2 years from any sort of authority.
Generally, the court order ceases to have effect after 1 year in force. An application can then be made to the CMS. If you have just one child then you pay 19 per cent of your gross income unless you have a relevant child living with you in which case you pay 16.4 per cent of your gross income.
I'm not sure where you got your percentages from, under the current CMS guidelines, for one child it's 12% of gross income, for two children its 16% of gross income and for three children it's 19% of gross income.
Generally, in contact cases, the family court will not get involved with maintenance arguements, contact and maintenance are two entirely separate issues in their eyes.
As I mentioned before, your cross borders situation might not be conducive to open a claim with the CMS, I think it might have to go via the courts....best to check this with CMS here, they should be able to advise you.
Yes you are correct. I meant to say 12 per cent. Further, any income above £800 per week will incur the following additional deductions:
1. For one qualifying child - 9 %
2. Two child will incur 12 %; and
3. Three qualifying children, it's 15 %.
All the best
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.