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Hi guys,
Just to set the scene - my baby girl is 14 months. I have her every weekend for 48 hours. I pay maintenance at £370/month.
I am looking to take time off work to spend some extra time with my daughter. Fridays are a good day to take off as it adds to the weekend plus is a good day for me to take at work. My daughter goes to nursery all day on a Friday and my ex is saying that she wants her to go to nursery and that she has pre-paid for her to go there so in her mind she would be out of pocket if she didn't go.
My view point is that I will be paying for my daughter while she is with me if I had her on a Friday and do not see why I should pay extra for the nursery fees. I had already offered that she could have free child care on Fridays as my mother who is a trained child care professional would look after her with my nephew who she has anyway and is the same age but she refused. Anyway, I just think that if you pay for the terms there are bound to be odd days that you miss.
The money (£40 quid or so) is not really the issue, it is more the principle of it. I'm not stubborn but she has and is really giving me so much hassle over anything and everything. She is one bitter and twisted individual bent on making things difficult.
I would just like a balanced impartial view on this as to whether I am right or not and perhaps an argument that I can put forward to state my case.
Thanks in advance!
Assuming that you are paying in accordance to the CSA calculation, then that's all you pay - anything in addition is entirely up to you.
As to the pre-paid nursery costs, what difference does it make - you ex has paid this, so she expects your daughter to be cared for, if you chose to do that at a cost to you (time/effort/reduction in income), then your daughter is still being cared for, and you ex is no worse off.
However, the question is whether it's worth the argument - I can't say that either of you is right or wrong, you just have different opinions. It may be something that might best be sorted through mediation - would you ex be likely to agree to that?
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