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Ex lying about 50/5...
 
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Ex lying about 50/50 shared care - how do I fight this?

 
(@artistdad)
New Member Registered

I have had equal shared care with my ex for 3 years. My child stays with me for a week, then my ex, then back to me, so exactly 50:50 give or take. Despite this, I privately paid my ex £500 per month to buy uniform, pay for hobbies etc. for our child. 

My ex has always been volatile, but since I introduced my new girlfriend to our child last month, she has put a false CMS claim in. She has said I only have our child 1-2 nights a week, despite it being equal. I explained to CMS on the phone that we have equal shared care, but was told they ‘automatically take the lower parents entry’. I’ve since had the decision letter stating I need to pay over £1,000 per month to my ex. I cannot afford to give my child a good quality of life whilst they are with me with these payments. 

Please can someone advise how I can win the mandatory reconsideration. My ex claims child benefit so I know that will be a hurdle, I know to quote section 50 of the children’s act, having read another thread on here. I have the following evidence:

- Many emails and text messages from my ex demonstrating 50:50 care. Several of these emails even state in my exes words ‘We have 50:50 care’.

- Proof I have paid for things such as opticians and glasses, activities for our child, days out. I have recently bought new school shoes so I can also include the receipt for that. My child also does a library group in my area on the weeks I have them, so I can show that (it is free but demonstrates they have a regular activity whilst with me). 

- Proof I have paid an informal amount of £500 per month, despite having 50:50 care.

I really need to win the mandatory reconsideration. Short of including footage from my doorbell or mileage from my car, I don’t know how I can prove I take my child to school, attend school appointments etc. I can say, ‘I attended parents evening on x date’ and show emails liaising with the school. It just seems to be my word against hers, I’m desperate for any advice. 

Frankly I am flabbergasted that the CMS have just believed my ex, now I am liable for these insane payments, and I understand that in the meantime I need to pay and when I win and the case is closed, I will not get any of the money back. 

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 21/08/2024 7:43 pm
(@simon-foot)
New Member Registered

feel your pain am in exactly the same position.  Did you get any advice, as I am trying to wade through what I do next.  I am told that I need to apply for benefits myself.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 22/08/2024 10:20 am
(@artistdad)
New Member Registered

Do the CMS read all the documentation provided with a mandatory reconsideration?

So far I have a 5 page letter, with 10 attachments. All is relevant information and proof of shared care. I want to be as detailed as possible. I have included opticians, dentist, doctors appointments, school liaising. I have also included receipts and screenshots for things I have bought for my child in the last 6 months (clothes, pack lunches, books for school, school shoes). I also have included numerous emails from my ex where she states we are both 50:50 and I even found one from 3 months ago where she states that I am ‘an equal resident parent’!

Will the CMS actually read all of this? I am failing to see how they can possibly uphold my exs claim that I only have my child 1-2 nights per week - there’s numerous evidence of her admitting that this isn’t the case!

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 22/08/2024 11:50 am
(@bob49papa)
Active Member Registered

Sorry to hear your about your current situation. If you have evidence as you mentioned that prove you have 50/50 overnight equal shared care of your child/ren, you should put in claim for child benefit. Though, child benefit will tell you on their website it is paid to only one parent if it is only one child that is being care for by both parents. There are people who have stated child benefit was paid to both parents who have equal shared care of one child. You could also, call their helpline, you may be lucky and speak to a good adviser who may be able to advise you further. I would normally explain to child benefit that payments from them is official evidence of equal shared care and both parents active involvement in your child's upbringing. You are in a very good privileged position, in that, you have evidence in writing from mother of your child confirming 50/50 shared care of your child. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 23/08/2024 10:49 am
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