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Hello,
I pay directly to the kids mother CMS on a monthly basis and she is asking for extra to pay for school uniforms. It is my understanding that the money i pay her includes things like school uniforms. Am i correct?
Hi
Yes thats correct. Your legal obligation is to pay the amount as per CMS. However depending on situation, the amount paid may not be enough and then it is up to you as to whether you pay any extra.
Depending on whether you have a good relationship with ex, have a good arrangement re seeing the kids then its a decision for you to make.
I'm unemployed and CMS say I need to pay £35 pm CMS, my ex has the 3 kids. I always ask the kids if they need anything, usually they say no, however last time I saw them my eldest said they needed school uniforms. So I gave a little bit of cash I had. I know the amount I'm giving via CMS makes no dent in her overall costs to bring up the kids.
Plus it all depends on how much you are paying at the moment, how much money you have left over and what your ex is doing with the money you already give her.
All the best.
I pay what the CMS tell me to pay and I have the children overnight about 45% compared to her at 55% (of the year).
we do not have a very good relationship at all
You don't have to pay any more...
But.. Do you do any school runs whilst the kids are with you?and do you provide ALL of their clothing/shoes when they are with you or do the kids bring along clothes/shoes from mums?
I do the school runs when they are with me. I provide for their clothing/shoes/food/roof overhead/heating while they are with me
Great then if you have your own set of school uniforms to use when the kids are with you and you're doing the school run etc then absolutely no further money is required to be paid.
However if you are using the same uniform as when the kids are with your ex then if I was in your shoes I would contribute something but not 50%. After all if the kids use the same uniform then there will be more wear and tear etc.
Hope that helps.
Sorry, correction, in terms of clothing I do not have school uniforms. Hence my forum feed.she is demanding that I pay for my own or towards the ones she has bought on top of the monthly maintenance I pay her
In that case I would agree with her.
The CMS you pay provides financial care for when the kids are with her. It already takes into consideration that the kids spend 45% of their time with you and is reduced accordingly.
Therefore I feel it is reasonable to either get your own set or contribute towards a set. As I say if you are using the same set there is greater wear and tear than if the children only using it when they are with your ex.
After all she could send the kids to you without any uniform and you would have to go and get your own set anyway like you do with the other clothing and shoes.
Contributing and having your own set also have pros and cons.
Contribute - kids will have one set of clothes and especially shoes so no issues with getting used to different footwear. However she may decide to buy new uniform more frequently once you agree to pay towards it and result in arguments etc.
Get own set - higher upfront cost and you have to make sure it stays at yours and doesn't go off to your exes and not returned. However you manage costs, quality and when it is changed.
Personally I would get my own set.
Just my views.
hi,
agree with daddyup about getting own set of clothes/school uniform. if she already refuses to give clothes, you will end up with own sets anyway. i'm out of work so not paying anything as per CMS and sticking with their decision.
It is not the fact that she refuses to send the children’s clothes to me, I have always bought them the essential things they need when they’re with me. It’s just the Extra payments for uniforms I have an reservations about. They come under “clothing” as per what the CMS say “food/clothing/roof over head etc”
Yes but that payment is for clothing when the children are with your ex. The CMS payment you pay is not for 100% of all the childs clothing as because the kids stay overnight with you the amount that you pay is already reduced to reflect the fact that you will incur costs when the children are with you such as clothing (Inc school uniform), shoes, food etc.
There is no extra payment if you get your own set of uniform like you do with all other clothing.
Another thing to keep in mind is that in future you will also be asked to contribute towards children's school trips aswell as your CMS will also not cover this.
what about the fact that I dont get any financial assistance/CMS from her to pay towards the cost of the children when in my care? Why should it only work one way!!
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