Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi, new to the forum, not really sure where to look as I'm not actually through the system more a legal agreement when we seperated but to cut a long story short I'm being furloughed and its not quite 80 percent because of the cap but not far off, my ex works for NHS so she is working full time so I have the kids I have went from after my work on a Monday and Thursday and every 2nd weekend to there full time carer on the wake off this covid outbreak, I have them every day and everything that goes with it lunch, snacks dinner etc, I'm in a rental and there's no help from the land lord and I still have bills to pay loans etc alot of the stuff that was ours but because it was in my name she left me with,so most of my wages are gone and even more so now as I'm on less pay and plus my shopping has trebled, my ex agreed when we seperated that if ever never got paid one week or off sick etc I wouldn't have to pay and I thought that we had every thing sorted but now she is demanding payment everyweek although I have the kids full time, I pay her 100 a week normally for the 2 kids and she says she will drop it to 82, now as far as I'm aware maintenance is the day to day care of the kids, which I am now providing, so I'm just not sure what too do, I don't mind giving a little but she is effectively happy for me to be left with nothing a week while I have the kids and she still works full time, not sure if anyone is in similar position and knows wether I have a leg to stand on by putting payments on hold while I care for them full time for this spell? Thanks in advance
hi,
you could check cms calculator to see how much you should be paying:
https://www.gov.uk/calculate-child-maintenance
its difficult. am assuming you have a private arrangement for maintenance?if shes reasonable she would let you pay nothing while the kids are in your care full-time, for temporary. see if you can reason with her more. or see if she is willing to drop it to less than 82 as your struggling.
I would try to avoid going through child maintenance service. it will likely cause more misery for you. as you don't have court order, she could tell them the kids only stay 1 night a week with you, or none at all, and get more money from you that way.
We have a legal seperation in place that states I pay 100 a week and have the kids on certain days and nights so I'm covered In that sence as it's a legal document, csa says I should be paying 98 a week and I pay 100 so it's right amount, unfortunately no reasoning, her dropping to 82 a week is her being reasonable in her eyes, yet she just went and bought a new 10k car, I think I may just have to tell her if she's wanting me to pay the money then I'll just stick to our care agreement then she would have to take time off work, but this also make me look like the bad guy when I'm actually loving having the kids full time, she pretty much wants her cake and eat too
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.