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Hi there,
I am new to the site and looking for some advice.
After splitting with my ex partner I paid child Support each month (even though she was telling my daughter she wasnt receiving a penny, resulting in my daughter resenting me!) My ex was spending the money on clubbing etc, I had my daughter begging me to pay as her mum said she couldn't feed/cloth her properly without any money from me ! I WAS paying!! I complained to CSA that I was financially struggling to pay the Maintenance and that they left me with £300 to live on. This is because when we split we had a JOINT loan which was £500 per month which she refused to contribute to. This loan was taken out to pay off her dept when we got together (i know what you are thinking yes stupid!). I had a tribunal but they wouldn't reduce my payments.
My daughter had finally had enough a few months later and came to live with me. My ex refused to have anything to do with her told me to change her schools etc which I did. This situation made me alot happier knowing my money was actually going on my daughter and it made life easier that my ex wanted nothing to do with her. However 3 months later (having bought all new cloths toys etc as she wouldnt let my daughter have anything) She told her she would commit suicide if she didn't return (Im guessing she realised how worse off she was financially). My daughter went to her Grandmas for the day and didn't return... We got social services involved and they said she is better off with the mother etc. I just was hitting my head against a brick wall.
I have since emigrated to Canada due to better job prospects for my field of work and have been putting the maintenance away monthly into a separate account. However I am still technically "Married" after the decree Nisi was issued nothing happened. I have now been made aware I can apply for the Decree absolute + Frank and final disclosure which I will be doing :boohoo: not looking forward to this as even though our relationship ended with no assets and me leaving with double the dept she had she still wants a lump sum of money! My question is when going through this process can they make me pay her maintenance when I am residing in Canada or will they be satisfied with me agreeing to give my daughter the lump sum when she is 18.Also I am putting away the exact same amount I was in the U.K will they want to work out a new amount of my Canadian wage which is more but cost of living is alot more here!!
If I go for divorce and I am made to pay more maintenance directly to her it will kill me as I know my daughter will see none of it! I am also going for Permanent residency in Canada which my daughter is eligible for but she refusing to take her to the medical and once Immigration have seen I have tried my best they will remove my daughter from the application and she will never be able to get the residency through me. Which is such a shame as it is a great oppurtunity for her.
What a mess! Hope someone can advise me,
Hi there Mike123 🙂
I would think that The UK has an arrangement with Canada concerning the payment of Maintenance but not 100% on that. I think the best thing for you to do would be to seek some legal advice about this as I dont know very much about divorce etc.
Best of luck with it and sorry I couldnt help :unsure:
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