Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hello Everyone.
I am looking for some advice.
I have a 16-year-old son. I have never missed a child maintenance payment in those 16 years. When he finished school he decided to go to college. Unfortunately, he didn’t take college seriously and ended up being expelled. He attendance was 12% out of 100. I told him till I was blue in the face about how he should be concentrating on his career etc etc.
Now he’s been expelled, I was hoping that he would learn his lesson and look for a Job. His mother said he will be going to another college in September ( he doesn’t even know what he wants to do at college)
I can only assume she’s driving him to this so she can still get money from myself and doesn’t care the fact my son is dossing about doing nothing with his life.
I decided to not make a payment to her last month – Because he is no longer in ” full time education) and I was hoping that would then drive her to encourage him to look for work like I have been doing the last year… Instead I receive a letter from the CSA stating that I need to make payments to his mother. I have now submitted evidence, a letter from the college stating that he is in no further education with the college. I think the CSA are trying to find out if she is still claiming child benefit.
Does anyone know where I stand on this situation? Even tho my son is no longer in education, would have to now pay via the CSA? I’m aware if he does go to college in September, I would of course make payments to his mother.
This doesn’t at all mean I won’t provide for my son. I am more than willing to pay for his bus passes, food, clothes etc… But I would like to be able to give that money to my son and know what the money is actually going on!
Sorry for the essay 
Any help/advice would be great.
Hi,
CMS are very rigid in their proceses. If they check that mother is still getting child benefit, then very likely they will expect you to continue paying maintenance. They expect parents to report changes, otherwise there is potential for you to keep paying maintenance until the final cut off, when child turns 20.
I'm in a very similar situation with my son who quit his college course (he is 18) and is doing nothing with his life. I informed the CMS who came back and said they rejected my claim that he was no longer in education, without any explanation. At a loss what to do really?
@carlosfandango hi, do you know if he is working? if he is working and getting taxed, DWP/CMS can see that information. take a look at this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UCgxgwt_Gs
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.