[Solved] Affair led to child - what are my rights now?

Hi there,

There is very little you can do to stop this....your name doesn't have to be on the birth certificate for the CSA to ask for payments from you. You can ask for a DNA test but you would have to pay for it and if it comes back that you are not the father they would reimburse the cost of the test. However they do nor suspend payment until the results are back. If you don't pay they will pursue you for arrears and take it directly from your wages.

If you google the CSA calculator you will be able to input your details and find out roughly what you will be expected to pay. They will take into account your child and adjust the payment.

There is a useful sticky that is at the top of the Child Maintenance section, it's called "how does the CSA calculate payments" and it links to a CSA leaflet that explains things in a bit more depth.

Hello Ells1973

Thank you for your recent post. I am William, the Child Maintenance Options consultant.

As the child's father, you have a legal responsibility to financially support your child even if you are not named on the Birth Certificate. By contributing financially you can show your child how you are still helping to take care of them, no matter what else has changed.

You have said that your child's mother has written to you saying she will be applying for child maintenance. No-one has to arrange child maintenance through the Child Support Agency (CSA). It may be a difficult situation but if you can reach an agreement with your child's mother you could try and sort things out amicably and put in place a family-based arrangement. This arrangement will enable you both to decide between yourselves what your child needs and how you will provide this. This could be a combination of financial assistance and contributing towards other things like buying clothes or nappies for your child. This kind of arrangement is not legally binding but it is flexible to meet the needs of your child.

If you want some help planning your conversation or talking to your child's mother about money, we have a "discussion guide" to help you. We also have a family-based arrangement form that can help put your agreement on a more formal basis. You can find these on our website at www.cmoptions.org.

If you would like an indication of how much child maintenance may be payable based on the CSA guidelines, you can use our online calculator. This is on our website at www.cmoptions.org/en/calculator. You may wish to use this figure as a starting point if you were to set up a family-based arrangement.

If you are unable to reach an agreement that you are both happy with, you or your child's mother has the option of getting the CSA involved. They have two schemes available called Direct Pay and Collect and pay. Direct Pay is where the CSA calculates child maintenance and then lets you and your child's mother decide how payments will be made. Once they have calculated the maintenance amount, the CSA will not contact you or your child's mother again unless your circumstances change or if they are told that payments have been missed.

The Collect and Pay service is where the CSA calculates, collects and enforces payments on your behalf, as some people prefer the security and help of third party involvement. If you decide to use the statutory maintenance service, then your responsibility to pay child maintenance will start from around the time you are contacted by the CSA or you contact them.

If you have got any questions about the CSA, you can contact them directly. You can find the contact details and information about how they work out child maintenance online at http://www.gov.uk/childmaintenance.

You or your child's mother also has the option of setting up a Consent Order, which is an official ruling made by a court. However, to arrange a Consent Order, you and your child's mother would need to agree how much child maintenance would be paid and how often before going to court. You could agree this either privately between yourselves, through a solicitor or a mediator. Once this agreement has been made, you and your child's mother can then ask the court to approve and authorise the Consent Order. This kind of arrangement usually happens when parents are going to court for other reasons, such as arranging a divorce or dividing their property or other assets. Arranging a Consent Order can be costly as fees for solicitors, mediators and court costs may apply. Legal Aid will not cover these costs if parents are only going to court to obtain a Consent Order for maintenance.

If you would like any information on your rights and responsibilities as a parent, you will need to seek legal advice. Gov.uk has a service which may help you to find a legal advisor or solicitor in your area. You can find this at https://www.gov.uk/find-a-legal-adviser.

We have a sorting out separation web-app that you may find useful, it offers help and support to separated families. You can find this at: http://www.dad.info/divorce-and-separation/sorting-out-separation.

To find out more about how Child Maintenance Options can help you visit: http://www.cmoptions.org. If you would prefer a friendly and confidential chat, please give the team a call on 0800 988 0988