DAD.info
Forum - Ask questions. Get answers.
Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:

Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.

Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.

If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help

1 child living with...
 
Notifications
Clear all

[Solved] 1 child living with me, 1 with their mum

 
(@Stonepool8)
New Member Registered

Hi all,

Firstly, I apologise if this has already been covered but it's difficult to tell form the topic titles and reading them all would take forever!

I've read a lot of maintenance calculation guides and scenarios where 50/50 guardianship is mentioned but this tends to concern arrangements where the child or children spend half of their time with one parent and half with another. My situation is a little different.

I separated from my wife in late 2006. We have two children together.
Since then, they have lived with their mum but come to me every weekend. She moved approximately 50 miles away and doesn't drive so I collect them every Friday and drop them back off every Sunday, although I don't suppose CSA would be bothered by such details...

My daughter is about to turn 16 and my son is 14.
My son has been struggling at school and is not happy at home so wants to come and live with me which, of course I am fine with, so I've made arrangements for a school transfer.
From the month that his mum and I separated over ten years ago, right up to now I have paid Maintenance without fail and without any argument.

Now that he is coming to live with me, we will both effectively be resident parents as we will both have one of our children living with us.
(At weekends the plan is that they will both be at mine one weekend, both at their mums the next and so on, so it's still 50/50).
This is why the guides I keep reading don't work, they are all based around only one NRP.

Logic would suggest that there is no point me paying her Maintenance to look after my daughter and then claim Maintenance from her to look after her son.
Experience, however suggests that CSA might disagree and I will somehow get shafted.

As a side note, their mum went on to have a 3rd child with another man before also splitting from him, so she's claiming from him as well, if that makes any difference.

So, although I appreciate that it can be difficult to give a definitive answer on specific case, I just wondered if anybody has found themselves in this situation and / or knows what a general rule of thumb might be with regards to payment (or not) of Maintenance?

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 23/01/2017 6:25 pm
 Yoda
(@yoda)
Famed Member

In theory, neither of you should pay the other maintenance and the 3rd child is irrelevant to this situation.

It's worth giving Child Maintenance Option's advice line a call and they can probably clarify things for you as a general enquiry without having to open a case.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 23/01/2017 10:38 pm
(@Stonepool8)
New Member Registered

Thanks for the quick reply, appreciated.

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 23/01/2017 11:01 pm
 Mojo
(@Mojo)
Illustrious Member Registered

Hi there

If you and your ex can reach a private agreement then the CSA don't need to be involved. If your ex went through the CSA prior to the change in your sons living arrangements then she should contact them and close the existing case.

You mention that the children stayed overnight with you 2 nights a week, that would have entitled you to a reduction of 2/7ths of the weekly amount you were liable for.

Once your son lives with you you will be entitled to claim child benefit and depending on your income, you may also be entitled to working tax credits and help with rent and council tax.

If you and your ex can't agree that one child each should cancel out the need for maintenance to be paid, and she wants to be paid via the CSA, I think they will say that you are liable to pay maintenance for your daughter. In this situation it would be up to you to open a case with the CSA to receive maintenance from her for your son. They will look at who is claiming child benefit for your son to determine who should receive the child maintenance for him.

As maintenance is worked out as a percentage of income, if you are a higher earner than her you will pay more. If she doesn't work, she may not have to pay anything, or at least a very small amount.

As Yoda suggests, the CMO can give you clarification about this.

All the best

ReplyQuote
Posted : 24/01/2017 4:16 am
(@Child Maintenance Consultant)
Noble Member Registered

Hello Stonepool8

If you have an existing statutory scheme arrangement in place when your situation changes and your son comes to live with you, you will need to notify them of your son’s change in living arrangements. This may result in you having to make a new arrangement altogether with your ex-wife.

As the moderators have pointed out after your son moves in with you, this may entitle you to apply for Child Benefit and other related benefits that you may be entitled to, depending on your income.

This also means that your ex-wife is required to contribute financially, in the form of maintenance, for your son and you also have the continued requirement to support your daughter. However, if you are both able to come to a family-based arrangement and agree that the shared care of your children would fulfil both your obligations this can be incorporated into your agreement.

A family-based arrangement is an agreement just between parents. They are not legally binding therefore you have no strict rules or formulas to follow. As well as a monetary payment parents can also decide for themselves what they would also like to include in their agreement. These type of arrangements do give parents the freedom to decide what the best agreement is for their family.

Family-based arrangements can include buying clothes for the children, contributing to their clubs or hobbies, swimming or dance lessons or buying equipment for school or college. They can also be a shared care arrangement.

From a legal point of view, and following the guidelines of the Child Maintenance Service, the current statutory scheme now in operation in the UK, you do both still have a requirement to provide maintenance to the other parent.

If you do earn more than your ex-wife you may be asked to pay more for your daughter as maintenance is based on your gross income, however, you could negotiate with your ex-wife and deduct the amount that she may be required to pay you and just pay the difference.

There are different ways you can negotiate your agreement with your ex-wife and Child Maintenance Options do have some supporting tools on our website at https://www.cmoptions.org that might help you both come to an agreement.

If you are unable to come to an amicable family-based arrangement with your ex-wife you both still have the option of using the Child Maintenance Service which is the current statutory scheme now in place.

The Child Maintenance Service does approach every application individually and will take the shared care you have of your children at weekends into account.

For further information about putting in place an application with the Child Maintenance Service and the fees involved with this, you can contact Child Maintenance Options directly.

Another choice you have for arranging child maintenance is through the courts in the form of a Consent Order in England and Wales and Minute of Agreement in Scotland. This is an agreement where you and your ex-wife with the support of a solicitor would need to agree what to include then the agreement is presented in court and is ratified.

You may also be interested to know the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) have a website, 'Sorting out Separation'. It aims to make it much easier for separating and separated parents (and childless couples) to find the support they need, when and where they need it, and encourages them to collaborate on a range of issues. The link is http://www.sortingoutseparation.org.uk/

For more information and for a more personalised service, you may wish to visit the Child Maintenance Options website yourself.

Regards

William

ReplyQuote
Posted : 24/01/2017 4:23 pm
Share:

Pin It on Pinterest