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I had a discussion earlier today on corporal punishment and its use in the home. I have to say I have never raised a hand to my kids and I don't think the physical approach works. I was very surprised at a work colleague however. This would be a man in his mid 30's and he was a very strong advocate of smacking children. His argument was that if parents were more physical in disciplining children it would definetly reduce delinquency and instill manners and respect in children that is very much lacking today. He even went on to say that he would feel it perfectly reasonable to use a leather belt in punishing children for misbehaviour if he had any (fortunately he doesn't). He claims as he was raised on the belt its perfectly acceptable for him to raise any children he may have in the future by implementing the same punishments. I am gobsmacked I have to say. I cant believe there are people of this mans age who feel this is appropriate discipline in todays society. Surely he is in the minority. I would just wonder what other dads out there think?
I was smacked occasionally when young - and caned and slippered at school. I was a little sod, basically. I don't think it did any harm, but I think caring for children has come on a long way since then, and I don't think there is a need for it - there are also more that can be taken away as a punishment than there used to be (when I was young, my parents removed all of my toys from my bedroom for a while as a punishment, and came back in later to find me happily playing with some ants on the window ledge), so I don't see the need for it these days.
Hi I would have to agree with you. I would have got the cane and leather strap at school and would have got dads leather belt at home when I stepped out of line. That would have been in the late 70's early 80's and like yourself I don't think it did me any harm. I suppose in those days that's how things were done. These days its a different story. Parenting techniques have come along way in the last 30 years so much so that I don't feel its necessary to use a leather belt to punish a child. That's why I was so shocked to hear my friend justifying such discipline. Idont think it can ever be justified in todays society
My mum used her leather army belt on me and my brothers, not often and it was kept in a particular drawer in the kitchen, she only had to look in the direction of that drawer and we would comply immediately so it was more of a deterrent than anything else! I might add my dad hated the very thought of the belt being used! I too was slippers and spanked at school which I can still remember vividly 50 years on....I would say that damaged me and had a lasting effect on my behaviour at school.
Times have changed and we as a society have a much better understanding of the emotional and psychological damage that physical punishment can cause. I admit to smacking my kids but only on the leg and very very occasionally....they are in their late twenties/early thirties now and have suffered no ill effects...we do laugh about it! Would I smack my grandchildren.....no definitely not!
I can relate to what you are saying. My dad was in the police and used his heavy leather uniform belt to punish us. It was always round his waist, poised and ready for action. As in your case though it was very often more a deterrent than anything else. If we saw him reach for his belt buckle we knew to tow the line so the hiding wasn't always necessary. We thought nothing of this type of punishment at the time but I would have to agree that today it has no place in the home. There's always a better way!
Interesting debate ....
My sons...all grown up now, said to me in a conversation some time ago that when I did
smack they deserved it.Obviously with hindsight!
I often threaten my grandchildren in a joking fashion that I would smack their bottom....
they howl with laughter and no...I wouldn't .
As it was said in previous posts...times and attitudes have changed.
Children can be disciplined by other means.
Take care
Kirsten
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