[Solved] AAAAARGH ...TEENAGERS !!!

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Oh boy are you having a bad day mate, loved your post - made me laugh out loud.

My 15 yo hormone monster started early as well - about 11 years so I am there with you feeling the pain - i have had four years of it, it gets worse and no end in sight :boohoo: .

There is a whole load of scientific hooha that i could quote about it but in simple terms in early teens the ability to control impulses is vastly reduced and does not fully form until the little cherubs hit their twenties. Add to this the rise in hormones and it is a potent mix that makes for parental [censored]. 😉

You haven't become the worlds worse parent over night - no matter what your son says. He doesn't really hate you and he doesn't wish he was never born. It is not personal, and trust me, I know it does feel very personal at times.

Pop back here whenever you need a sanity check

Well I have 2 eight year old boys (one my son and a step son) and they can already give it their all.

not looking forwad to teenage years and all that brings with it

...and then suddenly, I feel like he wouldn't p*** on me if I was on fire.

If it makes you feel any better, he probably would 😆

I think I missed all of this as my kids had such a bad time with their mother that they were grateful to be living with me. Having said that, my 13 year old has been with me for more than half her life now, so I think the 'honeymoon period' may be wearing off as her hormones start to rule the house.

If it makes you feel any better, he probably would 😆

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😆 oh, I'm still laughing at that.
Is this what I've come to. I have to set myself on fire to elicit a response, beyond a barely audible grunt!

Well. He has calmed down and come down from his bedroom and gone into school for the second half of the day. Progress.

The trouble with children is that they shatter all the illusions and misconceptions about your own childhood.

I was very insecure and cried all the time when little and I always put it down to my parents being permanently on the verge of splitting up. Then I had Boy2 and he was physically and emotionally the image of me. But he is in a pretty stable family. I was just an insecure kid. No reason. Illusion shattered.

I had a [censored] relationship with my own father. He didn't care. I couldn't communicate with him AND IT WAS ALL HIS FAULT! Then Boy1 made it to ten and appears to be treating me with the contempt that I feel should have been reserved solely for my own father. So it wasn't ALL HIS FAULT. I was just 'being ten'. Illusion shattered.

Children aren't supposed to redefine your entire life; even the bits before they were born. It's not fair! Whatever happened to me being right all the time. Humph! No one understands me. It just isn't fair!

Loving this thread - genuinely funny and yet I can feel Ratso's pain oozing from his every post. :p

...and then suddenly, I feel like he wouldn't p*** on me if I was on fire.

If it makes you feel any better, he probably would 😆

This is soooo funny man - best advice on the forum ever. 👿

Great post. It gives us dads with toddlers inspiration to prepare for what's to come. I thought my three year old boy was hard work but this put it into perspective with the joys of the teenager. just one question to the dads with teenage troubles. Is there a period between the extended terrible two's and the teenage years where all is calm and bliss. I HOPE SO!!!!!

Yes - its when they're asleep 😉

That is one of the best posts on parent life with growing kids I have come across. Describes the "cannot be removed pain" just right. Can I assume you started having dry runs for Teen years from when your teen/almost teen was around 7 or 8? Correct answer here to make me feel that I am not alone is "Yes" 🙂

Currently,
I am the worst father ever!
I know nothing
Anything he does which is annoying/wrong/disrespectful he learnt from us

I do agree though, the manual did not say anything about it starting now. Add to that I have a sweet, lovely daughter who is stubborn and has a temper on her which has not fully emerged as yet and I know I will have 10x the pain when she starts to flirt with the teenage years in about 3 years time.

Oh and while I am at it, how comes he can make her raise the dead with her screaming and crying by annoying her but if either of us say anything to make her cry we are awful parents who should learn to be nicer. *sigh*

A word from experience (I may have mentioned it before on the forum), if your first child is an angel, plays quietly, sleeps the right amount and the right time and doesn't have tantrums, whatever you do, don't make the mistake of assuming that your next child will be the same - that was a mistake my parents made with my sister, and then they had me...... 😆

Oh man! I thought our 8 year old could give the attitude, and from what I've read, you've all got boys, I've got the whole period thing to cope with ON TOP of her being a teenager! argh!!!

btw...actd...you're so right about the second child, as we've learned to our dismay :boohoo:

Wow, this has really struck a chord with me.

I have a fifteen year old girl. Great school reports, volunteers as a young leader at Brownies, attends venture scouts. Behind closed doors she and I clash terribly. Massive attitude, so much so that I have noticed I am starting to be reluctant to come home. It starts really small, as normal, then escalates. This evening I grounded her, only to see her cycle off past the front lounge window, about half hour later.

Massive row ensued between my wife and I. She also rows with my wife, but it doesn't really escalate to the same level. I feel that the support I give my wife, when they fall out, isn't reciprocated. For example, when my daughter is disrespectful to my wife I will say something like APOLOGISE TO YOUR MUM, DONT DISRESPECT HER LIKE THAT, though when my daughter and I fall out my wife is quiet, now and again chipping in CALM DOWN, to me not my daughter.

Daughter threatened to move out to nannys' house. I wasn't present for this. When my wife told me I replied that we should allow it, as there she wouldn't have unlimited computer access, lifts everywhere, money. Although on reflection I suspect that 'soft' nanny may do just that!!!!!

I work long hours, early starts and late finishes, shifts etc. I have found that I am now volunteering to stay on, come in early and even the overnighters.

I love my daughter, but just feel that my wife has undermined me for years so the respect has eroded.

What am I asking.................??? No idea, just feel a bit better sounding off.

Hi Harrier
It is a tough gig bring a parent. The kids just grow up but we have to learn to adapt our parenting skillsand it seems to be a constantly moving target.

All I can say, if you were looking for some support rather than only venting is to take a cool look at how you approach the situation and whether it could be done differently. Worked for a while for me but some things you just can't let go. also find if I am tired after work then I am likely to have more "run ins". Don't hide though by staying late, they won't be teens for that long (may feel like eternity)
Have always found that if kids sure at me or other such and my mum says "don't talk to your dad like that" I normally do not back her up as I am thinking "I can look after myself"

Good luck