Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
We are raising 3 kids : 2 (nursery), 4 (nursery), 7 (school).
Both are working full time. Relocated from another country about 7 years ago, don't have any family relatives around.
I think last year mentally broke us, I'm on a high dose of antidepressants, wife is still holding on. The rhythm of life when you spend your time either at work or with kids is killing after so many years. We are like walking zombies from 7am till 9pm . I don't enjoy being with kids anymore.
I don't see any exit out of this. We can't send kids to our parents and our parents can not come to us. With 2yo you still have to spend almost all time with them.
Its hard work raising children. As you say, its full on when they are young. Can you take it in turns to have a break? Do you have interests that you can follow when its your time off? Check out the various activities that are stress reducing such as swimming, gardening, yoga, baking. Exercise and fresh air are important. Take the kids to the park at weekends. Is there a baby sitting circle near you so you both get time together? Perhaps you can have one to one time with the children so you get to know them as individuals. It will get easier as they get older but it sounds as though some changes to your routine could be made. Keep communication gong with wife so you find a way through this together.
One trick is to plan days or events for the two of you that the children can come to, rather than planning things around the kids. Also play areas, such as childrens play villages etc, where there are other children around to play with gives you chance to sit with other parents and chill out slightly, while the children get on with it and play with other children, so they are tiring themselves out, rather than you.
We are raising 3 kids : 2 (nursery), 4 (nursery), 7 (school).
Both are working full time. Relocated from another country about 7 years ago, don't have any family relatives around.
I think last year mentally broke us, I'm on a high dose of antidepressants, wife is still holding on. The rhythm of life when you spend your time either at work or with kids is killing after so many years. We are like walking zombies from 7am till 9pm . I don't enjoy being with kids anymore.
I don't see any exit out of this. We can't send kids to our parents and our parents can not come to us. With 2yo you still have to spend almost all time with them.
Hey there, it sounds like you're going through a really tough time with everything on your plate—kids, work, and feeling isolated without family nearby. It's totally normal to feel overwhelmed and burnt out, especially after a year like the last one. Have you guys looked into any local support groups or maybe even hiring a babysitter occasionally for some breather time? Sometimes just a little break can make a huge difference. Hang in there and take care of yourselves.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.