Hi, it sounds like you have a good relationship with your daughter and you often spend time together. Things to consider are to ask yourself whether there are other issues often coming up re parenting your daughter together with your ex, do any of those have a higher priority than this one? Then if you still feel strongly about it and since you and your daughter are close, could you have a chat with her to see what she feels about this? You could listen to her views, without being negative about her mother or the new partner. You may need to consider also that she may be toying with the idea or might quite like to change her name, but doesn't want to offend you. Maybe a good stance is to prepare yourself for this kind of scenario and to be ready to accept this for your child's sake.
Consider whether this situation is one that you want to raise as an issue with your ex or whether you can accept her request, since it is something that doesn't actually alter the good relationship that you and your daughter have.
Have you looked into what the requirements are when travelling with a child with a different surname? This is a practical issue that you could discuss with your ex. Maybe another option is to think about making it simpler for both you and her, by your daughter keeping your name and adding the new name on to it. Hopefully that's given you some food for thought!
Parent Support @ Spurgeons + a parent of 3
Hi,
If you oppose the surname change, I suggest you can informally discuss with your ex, or using a mediator. I have come across people that have changed names via deed poll, and not consulting other parent. If mediation fails, you could apply to court, seeking a specific issues order.(c100 form).
Info about legal issues and childs name: