Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi dads, me again already!!
Quick outline, 7 year old daughter, got 70% shared care last summer due to mums drug addiction. Mum was told that if remains abstinent from these drugs then she can go back to court this September.
It’s only been 8 months and mum is now threatening court order as she has a new job (again) 4th job since last april.
This is the 5th time she’s asked to change the order, the first one was the day after the final hearing!
She is demanding I go to mediation, but it’s not been long enough, she’s only really settled the last 2 months.
I believe mum is still using due to erratic behaviour etc.
What shall I do? I’m not changing it this early on as Cafcass stated atleast 12 months and I’m not attending mediation as it won’t be to mediate, and changes will be wanted again in a few months when she gets another job?!
Help, had enough now!
Say you are happy to attend mediation if she pays for it all. You can listen to what she says and if u dont like it u just say u are not agreeable and walk away. Its then up to your ex to apply to family court which will have to be at least a year after your last hearing. You can proudly tell the courts u attempted mediation to resolve the issues, but say current order is working well and its too soon to change things during these difficult covid 19 times .
Remember mediation is just a person trying to reach a compromise. attend but no need to agree to anything. U can tell them why u got 70% care and u believe she may still be using , but hopefully for childrens sake she isnt. 2 months is way too short if she has stopped. 1 year minimum with drug/alcohol tests which u can make her do if it returns to court
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.