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Good Morning All, I have come to this forum in search of guidence or some general advice based on experiences of other dads going through a simular experience removed link
I am currently thinking about divorce as I feel my marriage has broken down, has become one sided and is affecting my personality and mental health.
I have done some research myself in what is an absolute mindfield, and am accepting of the fact that I will effectively give up 50% of my assets as a 'shared pot' as my wife lives for the day no contribution to the pot.
My main issue is accomodation, I have no family to help and support me with temp accomodation to allow me to save, and it pains me to think of renting and effectively putting money into a landlords pocket rather than into my childrens inhertitance pot.
My starting assumption is that i would have to stay named on the mortgage as i doubt my wife would pass affordability checks on her own, and i would not be able to access equity.
Question i have is there any way can I get a 2nd mortgage and how? Has anyone been through a simular process?
hi,
have you checked valuations for your property? if it was sold and there is equity split, hopefully there is enough funds to buy another property for yourself. I suggest you contact mortgage companies and request a mortgage capacity report.
@dadmod2 thanks for your reply, I have a view of the equity only issue is that my wife is adament that she is staying put, wont consider the rationale thing and that would be to spilt the equity based on both capacity reports to end up where we both have a sufficent house for our children to stay with us, also this benefits the children in the long run. Also concerned that she would not pass affordability, and the mortgage company do not allow equity release.
ok, can try mediation with her.if that fails then can seek help from court.
I went through a similar process myself when my ex and I separated about 7-8 years ago. I would seriously advise against taking out a mortgage on another property for these reasons:
1/ Any property you have equity in is fair game to be taken into by your wife's solicitor as an asset in the event of Divorce
2/ A 50:50 split on assets is a starting point, division of assets is very much a sliding scale and will go in your wife's favour depending on factors such as the length of the marriage, whether any children live with her as main carer and her level of income. You may find yourself saddled with a mortage you can't afford.
My ex originally wanted to stay in the former family home too, we had a Repayment Mortgage which I extended the terms on and converted to Interest Only as I knew it would one day be sold so why pump money into a house which I may only get a small percentage of the equity on? I was right - this turned out to be only 15%! A lower mortgage payment also meant I could afford somewhere to live.
In the event, my ex decided to sell because she couldn't afford all the running costs on top. You could force this by instructing a Family Law Solicitor, in the event of a Divorce, all assets including pensions and savings are fair game to be divided.
If you are looking for something cheap to rent to save money, I took a room in a houseshare which was good value and it also meant I didn't get to spend too much time on my own so good for mental health.
Hope this helps,
Jon
@jlfrs Thank you and some great points you raised there.
1. My plan was to only take the new mortgage after the divorce was settled so it wouldnt be included in the asset share.
2. Assuming here that because I would pay the CSA charge and not the mortgage directly that my equity share once the transfer of equity was completed would only be the amount at the time of divorce and not future value, secured with a mesher order. I like the interest only option as this as you say would lock in the current equity but not increase it. And then a second mortgage may be more feasible after divorce.
3. I was thinking more about a place where the children could stay with me and be comfortable as assume i would have them every other weekend and some weekdays, so would need to consider at least a 1 bed house if renting
Thank you for the reply
You might be able to arrange half an hour consultation with a solicitor to find out where you stand and give you basic advice. There are some guides. on the advicenow.org.uk website on divorce and child arrangements. You might also get advice from dads unlimited.
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