Helping Your Child to Navigate Separation Anxiety

Hi MarkJons, Thank you for your post.  Starting school is a big milestone.  It is very normal for children to take some time as they adapt to the new routines and new environment, but it is hard to see our children feeling upset.  You clearly care very much about your son, and want him to be happy.

You can be a real support to your son by continuing to spend time with him, one-to-one, giving him your full attention (put the phone away!) and do something together which your son really enjoys.  It does not need to be expensive or complicated - anything simple such as building lego, going to a local playground, reading a story.  This time together will help to build your connection as father and son, and will help to ground your son because he will know he is safe and loved.  In time, this can also provide a space for him to share how he is feeling.  

During the school week, your son is likely to come home tired.  Quite apart from the school work, there is so much to take in as a young school child (the noises, the playground, learning to make friends, learning to sit still for a while etc), so try to keep the evenings and weekends quiet to allow time to re-charge.  A consistent bedtime routine, especially in the week, will really help and it can be another lovely opportunity for bonding such as having a cuddle and a story after a relaxing bath-time.  When your son comes out of school he may want to let off a bit of steam (can he run around a park or a garden for a little while?) or he may want to flop on the sofa and rest for a little while.  He may well be hungry, so a healthy snack at the end of school can really help.  Children often don't want to share all the details from the school day.  Do ask him how his day was and what he enjoyed, but don't worry if he does not have much to tell you.  

Most class teachers would encourage parents to raise any concerns with them sooner rather than later.  Perhaps you could see if your son's teacher could meet or have a short phone call with you, just so that you can share what you are experiencing.  You may well find that the teacher is able to reassure you.

However, if you suspect that the cause of your child being upset is related to something more serious, such as bullying, you must raise this with the school as soon as possible.  The sooner such challenges are addressed, the better for all involved.

The Dad.info website articles often cover topics relating to school.  Do take a look back through because you may find some useful resources there. 

Wishing your son a happy time at school going forwards  He is fortunate to have a supportive and loving Dad.