Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi
During financial settlement in court are assets and debts taken into consideration. Ie with my hard work assets have been built up but In my wife’s name. I have debts in my name. Are the books so to speak, balanced first before funds are, hopefully equally divided?
thanks in advance
hi,
generally both assets and debts are taken into account, together with both parents earning capacity/take home pay. Also the needs of both parents, who is primary carer of children etc.
There is a guide about divorce on the advicenow.org website which you may find helpful
Hello all
I will receive final order in couple of weeks but we haven't come to terms for financial settlement yet
In brief, we have 2 small children and 2 houses(both mortgaged) 1 we live in and the other rented.
The one we live in has equity of £275k and rented one £100k. Wife wants me to take rented property and move on with clean break.
Assets wise she earns more, has more savings and pension pot.
Divorce reason - hers extra marital affair.
Shall I fight for custody of children ? And do I stand to lose out the residence to her?
Thank you
@dad40707 I am very sorry to hear about your divorce. It cannot be an easy time for you all. I cannot speak into the financial decision making, but I can encourage you to reflect why you might seek custody of the children. Please don't be tempted to be swayed by finances, as unfair as things may seem. Whatever child arrangements you reach, the children will really benefit from time with each parent going forwards. They may be too young to understand what is happening now, but they are still likely to sense that changes are happening. Think about how you can continue to spend consitent quality time with them, doing things that they enjoy, giving them your full attention (phones away!). Not only will this provide them with the reassurance they may need (they are loved and that is not going to change despite other things changing) but it will also enable you to continue to build and enjoy the bonds you already have with them.
Going forwards, you might find something like our online parenting after separation course worth having a look at Parenting After Separation course | Separated parents course and there are lots of parenting resources on the Spurgeons website.
I hope that you are able to find a solution which works for you all, but particularly the children.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.