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Hi all, I’m new to the forum
So I’ve been having some issues with child access lately. A little background.....
Me and my ex split up last year (have 2 children 4 & 7 years old). She is in a new relationship. Due to Covid my access to them has been limited, however started to get better once lockdown was eased. I was made aware of her new partner being arrested recently for possible domestic abuse towards her (not sure on the ins and outs), called social services and they confirmed he wasn’t allowed near my children. Since that call social services called her and she has refused me to see my children. I then went to try mediation, of which she refused and hit me back with a non molestation court order (basically not allowed near her currently). I have now had to instruct a solicitor to fight this for me, goes to court in 10 days or so. He also wants to fight my child access case, however I wouldn’t be able to afford the fees and wouldn’t qualify for legal aid. I am considering asking the solicitor to fight the non molestation (that’s a fixed fee), but to also ask him to put my child access case to the court, along with doing my case notes. I will then represent myself in court. Is there any advice anyone could give for this? Any do’s or dont’s?
My theory is to represent myself and if things get tough or messy then involve a solicitor, that way saving me some of the costs from the outset. I am also aware my ex will ask me to do a drugs test as I used to smoke cannabis - although have been clean for a little while now. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks
Hi Kevros,
I can't comment on the CAO but i agree with your approach to non mol. If you can get it thrown out then better as if it sticks then it can impact child contact during the period it is in force.
I've also taken the same approach re solicitors costs, get them to do all the leg work and then represent myself in court (i'm not at the stage of going to court yet). I've also decided that I will pay to meet my solicitor in advance of any court hearings so he can take me through things . I will also be getting advice from this forum which in itself will be great but my solicitor knows the finer points of my case and everything that has gone on.
I've also created a separate thread re solicitors costs which if you take a look at should advise on how to keep your legal costs as low as possible.
Also in relation to any drug tests, my understanding is that it is best to delay any hearings re child contact etc until you know you can pass the drug test (it's out of your system). As if you fail then you have to go for a full set of regular tests (not sure of period) before you can see the kids which can take longer than if you just waited a little while in the first place.
https://www.dad.info/forum/legal-eagle/52710-solicitor-s-billing
Hope this helps..
hi kevros,
it all sounds daunting. there was a recent post on here from another dad. he went to court about non-mol. he asked can he file for a child arrangements order, and the court did it for him at no extra cost. you could stop instructing a solicitor for the child arrangement part.
child access part it is largely left to courts social workers (cafcass) as they take over and will do reports on you and possibly a drugs test. i would not delay for the child access part. getting a hearing for it can take 2-3 months. probably longer now due to covid issues.
Why did she go for a non-mol all of a sudden? That is really odd. Sorry to hear about the domestic abuse from her new partner, I hope this has not impacted your kids in any way, and I don't see why she should be angry that you know about this.
Good luck with the non-mol hearing, if you can get this out of the way and not put on you, it should work well for you in the child arrangement hearings. A lot of us on here self represent for that, so feel free to ask any questions and we will be happy to give our advice.
No idea, I think because her new partner doesn’t or isn’t allowed to see his kids I feel he’s putting ideas into her head. My solicitor has said that he will agree to an undertaking? Where I agree to 'lower my tone', said this would be easier in the long term rather than to fight against the non mol. Just waiting for my solicitor to confirm all paperwork but will be definitely seeking advice from here as it’s been great so far. Thank you all so much
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