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Hello All,
I am hoping for some advice on a few points.
My wife and I separated two years ago (no-fault). I work away for two weeks at a time and am home for three weeks. Typically (so I have been told!!), the Ex has met up with two other girls who were recently left by their husbands (one in not so nice circumstances) and this 'bitter being' is in my ex's ear about her doing this and that, and to be blunt I am finding it all very difficult as it is making her become nasty when we were able to discuss things before.
1) The marital home was up for remortgage and due to her low earnings and with her father being too old, she couldn't do this on her own. I said I didn't want her to obviously be homeless and and so remortgaged. She immediately changed all the locks with many of my belongings in there. There has been no violence or threats. Since the day I left I have always knocked on the door. What can I do to access my things? What are my rights? Not that I want to go and move back in and I do wish to respect her privacy.
2) I paid her £300pcm towards care for my son, we argued so i stopped for month which resulted in her going to the CMS and I now pay £470pcm. The payment is based of last years earnings when I sold some shares to pay off all the debt associated with building works on our marital home. I tried to speak with CMS to tell them this, and that I have my son for the majority of my time off. (She has him for 16 nights I have him for 19!) and also that the payment is based on last year's figures. They seem to only listen to the parent who instigates the claim and now I must provide either a Court Order or a letter signed by both solicitors. Is this normal/legal?!
3) I work offshore meaning I am away for two weeks with a travel day either side so my ex has my son for those 16 days. I have said I want him for the rest of my time off (19 nights). She isn't happy about this and we are currently going through pointless mediation sessions where she can't agree to me having him 50% of the time - blaming my job. Does anyone have any guidance as to how best approach all of this? I have considered making her an offer of £300pcm and bowing down to her having our son in my middle week but just feel she really wants money.
Mental health is really being affected and I am going to speak to doctor about this when home. Solicitors also now onboard with regards finally progressing my divorce.
Sending love to all of those struggling. This forum really does remind us we are not alone.
Dan
hi,
if she is not agreeing to 50/50 child contact, I think it will be more difficult trying to achieve through courts, because of your work situation. they would expect you to be able to do school runs. If you take legal route, I think your best outcome would be to have child every other weekend, and half of holidays. parents seem to become more hostile once courts get involved. if you need further advice you can send me private message.
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